Swansong
by Kitt SummerIsle
Summary: Starscream has a painful secret and he is concerned about his trine-mates so he plays matchmaker. Written in loose fashion after an Lj kinkmeme prompt which I read quite a while ago and now I can't find.
1. Secretive

**Title**: Swansong

**Rating**: changed to M

**Verse**: G1

**Genre**: drama, H/C

**Characters**: Starscream, Thundercracker, Skywarp, Autobot ensemble

**Warnings**: threesome, spark-sex, voyeurism. Explicit sex-scenes will be censored on ffnet, full chapters in AO3 (link in my profile).

**Summary**: Starscream has a secret and concerned about his trine-mates so he plays matchmaker. Written in loose fashion after a kinkmeme prompt which I read quite a while ago and now I can't find.

**Note**: klik – Cybertronian second, breem - Cybertronian minute, joor – Cybertronian hour, orn/cycle – Cybertronian day, groon – Cybertronian month, vorn – Cybertronian year (a lot of Earth years). Hic – Cybertronian kilometer

**Note2**: the specific way of spark merging by pulsing out the spark-energy is used in the fic by permission of ladydragon76.

**Note3**: I got a few reviews and PMs about spark-sex not needing to be censored. I still think that all kinds of sex is sex for Transformers, and neither is inappropriate in a story, but I got convinced and updated the chapters accordingly.

* * *

**Secretive**

"Starscream!" – Megatron's furious roar could be heard everywhere on the battlefield. – "If you don't come here right now, I'll deactivate you."

Even Optimus Prime was somewhat surprised by the annoyed order. Sure, they've always seen and heard the contempt the warlord handled his Second with, but this time, Megatron actually sounded serious with the threat. It was illogical really, as the Seekers were in a heated aerial battle with the Aerialbots and he could see no visible reason why Megatron would need his SIC right then. But who was he to try to find out his enemy's reasons… he distracted the tyrant from his target with a strong punch to his faceplates, engaging him with their private battle.

A bit further afield a few other mechs also took notice of the order. Sideswipe – whose jetpack was damaged the last time, so he was forced to stay on the ground – quickly checked the Seekers' positions, following them with his blaster, but not shooting, because the Aerialbots were too close around them. He watched the battle overhead interestedly, not really expecting the stubborn Seeker to leave for any ranting that Megatron could throw at him. Not that he could have left the battle safely, the frontliner thought, it was really a close one. The five Aerialbots were really giving a run for the Seekers' money this time and all of them had some slightly smoking or sparkling wounds on their wings.

Interestingly, Starscream didn't seem to be as confident as usual either and his superior speed wasn't noticeable either. He was still good in the air, but it was more his experience and skill than the speed he was so famous for. Turning sharply in the air with a quick transformation sequence, the Air Commander spun and shot at Silverbolt, who had to roll fast to avoid getting hit. But the move put him in Air Raid's way and the younger flier didn't hesitate to shoot him, late to duck as the tricoloured Seeker uncharacteristically was.

Sideswipe watched with growing interest as Skywarp teleported frantically in front of his trine-leader, taking the shot that would have hit Starscream in the fuselage, possibly causing a serious injury from the close shot. There were some shouts that he couldn't quite catch and then to his and everyone else's surprise the three Seekers started to withdraw from the fight, covering each other with great skill but at the same time noticeably retreating. It was even more surprising because Megatron hasn't ordered a retreat, quite the opposite, he was shouting at them to get the frag back to the battle, looking almost deranged in his fury.

But the Seekers didn't turn back. Sideswipe saw the Aerialbots pursuing them for awhile, but after some hics they gave it up to get back to the battle and find some targets for themselves that were more ready to fight. Megatron was promising the Pit to his recalcitrant Seekers but he was busier now with their retreat and with Optimus Prime occupying his attention.

"_What the frag was that?"_ – Sideswipe commed to Silverbolt, as he paused for a klik in pummeling the Stunticons. – _"The Screamer ran?"_

"_Don't know. He wasn't quite himself" _– came Silverbolt's answer –_ "We beat them off easier than ever."_

"_Maybe they lack fuel. Didn't have a lot of luck lately, have they?"_

"_Could be."_

But Sideswipe couldn't waste more time conversing with Silverbolt, as the battle was turning chaotic. Even without the Seekers, the Decepticons pressed on, clearly desperate to rob as much energon as they could. It took several more breems of frantic fighting before Sideswipe saw the dark shuttle and the triplechanger one lifting off with their precious cargo, all available Con covering their way out, before Megatron called a hurried retreat. Sideswipe and his brother was put to work as usual with helping to clear away the bigger debris that the battle caused in the human structures, so he didn't have any more time to think about the events that transpired any more. Consequently, he didn't notice that the Aerialbots flying overhead, covering them from above were only four in number.

-o-o-o-

Air Raid flew after the Seekers both because Silverbolt ordered it and because they all were curious about their strange behaviour. They noticed in the last few battles that Starscream's trine-mates grew increasingly protective of him, even in the face of his occasional protests and annoyed screeches. The Aerialbots all knew of course that the Trine was far closer than most Autobots thought and that their seemingly cold behaviour towards each other was nothing more than a façade. Starscream was unobtrusively shielding his wingmates from Megatron with all his annoying bravado and provocations of the tyrant, while the other two tried to give no blackmail material for the other Cons. Still, lately this façade started to have cracks in it, as the younger Seekers became strangely protective of their leader.

The Seekers had a little headstart though and Air Raid had to search for them – the Trine suspiciously didn't leave towards the Nemesis. Their signals were weak and he had to really concentrate on following them as they had gone further and further from the battlefield, the Ark and the Decepticons as well. He almost gave it up after a joor, since Silverbolt told him not to call attention to himself and he should really have gone back with the others by this time. But suddenly, two of the signals started to strengthen, like heading towards him and Air Raid remembered that he, too was trackable and without his brothers he was distinctly a minority against the Seekers.

The two spots that started to grow in front of him took on bluish and black colours and Air Raid knew that something was really, really strange. For Starscream to leave his trine-mates to intercept a following jet while he was continuing to drop off the younger flier's map, was nearly unheard of. The Air Commander, despite of Megatron's oft repeated debasements was not a coward and three on one odds were safe in anyone's books. Still, he wouldn't discover anything by turning back, so Air Raid continued on his intercept route until the two Seekers grew to noticeable size and fired some warning shots around his wings.

"Look, I mean no harm!" – he commed on an open frequency – "We were… wondering if everything was all right?"

He got no answer to his admittedly lame question, but the shots came closer and one even grazed the underside of his right wing. It hurt, but Air Raid knew that had they shot seriously, he wouldn't be still flying. He didn't mean to talk to them really, they were planning more like a little spying on the Trine, like Fireflight did sometimes, but he was discovered far too early for that.

"Okay, I will just… leave if you're so serious?"

Still no answer but the two jets were distinctly herding him backwards, away from… wherever they were going. Air Raid gave up. He was unsuited to sneaking, just like most if not all jets and he didn't want to force the issue, not to mention being overwhelmed by the Seekers. Turning around visibly and setting a nice, obviously Ark-ward course, he saw the silent Seekers remain behind. His last thought about them was how strange it was to hear not a single word from even Skywarp.

-o-o-o-

Jazz saw Air Raid leaving the battlefield and conferring with Prowl, between the two of them they could very well guess the reason for it too. While Jazz had more problems on the ground to watch the aerial battle, Prowl did, and he too saw the uncharacteristic behaviour of the Seekers. While they trusted the Aerialbots enough not to be worried when Air Raid followed the retreating Seekers, Prowl suspected that whatever the Con fliers hid was more important than the young Aerialbot could discover. It then took less than a klik to formulate a plan, notify the Prime about it and comm Mirage to help Jazz to leave the battlefield unseen.

While the Porsche couldn't follow the Seekers, he could certainly track Air Raid – and with his unwilling and unknown help he kept after the Trine too. When Thundercracker and Skywarp chased back the younger flier, he got the chance not only to catch up with them, but as he soon learned their final destination wasn't so far either so as to loose them from scanning range. After the Aerialbot left, the two Seekers calmed down and Jazz could track them to a huge, empty warehouse in a deserted industrial area. Once close to it, the saboteur transformed quietly and sneaked among the mostly ruined buildings and heaps of debris until reaching his target.

The warehouse was gutted and in a sorry state with most windows broken and half the roof leaning ominously over the empty space. It was easier than ever in his career to spy on the Seekers inside as the building itself offered several smaller holes that he could employ. The two newly arrived Seekers were moving around, obviously familiar with the place and Jazz even noticed Thundercracker placing the recently acquired energon cubes into a small crate, leaving some out that he carried to the other two. Skywarp sat down beside Starscream who was sitting propped up by one wall, lightly petting a wing and talking quietly.

Sneaking to another, closer hole Jazz increased his audial sensitivity. Here, the Seekers were nearly backwards to him, Starscream almost beside the hole he chose and he could only see their faceplates from profile – but they were more audible. Skywarp absentmindedly fiddled with the torn plating on Starscream's wing but Jazz rather thought that it was just a make-believe effort and the Seeker's self-healing would take better care of it than the teleporter's fumbling digits.

"Star, here, drink it." - Thundercracker almost had to force a cube to Starscream's servo.

"A waste of materials…" – the tricoloured Seeker murmured, his rasping voice quieter than Jazz ever heard it.

"Just… just drink it okay?"

Starscream shrugged and sipped from the cube listlessly. Jazz subtly scanned the Seeker almost in front of him but he could see no reason for him to be so enervated. Even when Megatron beat the Seeker ragged for one reason or another, he was more angry, more resentful and stubborn… more lively in short. This listless leaning to the wall after escaping from the battle and obeying his younger trine-mate's order was about as far from the flier's usual behaviour than say Prowl's calm from Grimlock's rage.

"You two should go back to the Nemesis and tell Megatron that I crashed and you don't know where." – Starscream lifted his helm and spoke with only a tiny spark of his usual authority. – "Before it is too late for that…"

"What about you?" – Skywarp asked with a strangely deep concern in his frown.

"I won't deactivate." – Starscream sighed through his vents. – "But I can't go back now."

Jazz wondered why. Of course there was that disobedience during the battle and leaving early with some energon that he probably shouldn't have taken, but in truth it wasn't that unusual. Megatron would probably beat him to scrap, maybe throw him into the brig, but it wasn't like Starscream hasn't got that treatment a thousand times before. Thundercracker slowly got to his thrusters, standing hesitantly in front of Skywarp.

"We need to get that device he needs."

"We should stay with Star…" – the teleporter whispered, looking up to him, one servo still on a white wing, trembling slightly.

"No, you shouldn't." – Starscream snapped with a spark of his old air – "You go back and act like nothing happened. I'll be fine. Don't destroy your standing."

Thundercracker held out a servo to Skywarp, the younger Seeker taking it and letting him to pull him up from beside Starscream. He looked back down to his trine-leader, doubt clearly written on his expressive faceplates but in the end both Seekers moved slowly towards the door. Starscream shooed them out impatiently and waited unmoving until their engine noise died down. Jazz didn't dare to move a single limb as the Seeker seemed to listen carefully to his mates' sounds as they died down in the distance.

When the last sound was gone Starscream seemed to slump down with a sigh and his wings sagged heavily from his back. He put down the half drank cube carefully from his servo onto the dirty ground and pulled up his legs, curling into a loose ball. From his viewpoint close up, Jazz could see the minor trembling that ran across the white wings regularly and heard the soft sobs that had to come from the Seeker. He was shocked to his core. Not even he associated Starscream ever with crying. The mystery grew and Jazz decided to get to the end of it. But not this cycle, he thought; Starscream seemed to fall into recharge, the other Seekers were gone and he'd need to report to the Prime. But he'd come back as soon as he could in the next orn.

-o-o-o-

"Prime, there is something wrong with that Seeker, I'm sure."

"But you said that your scan didn't show anything out of order in him?"

"That's what I said, right. But it isn't like Screamer to give up like that and stay away from Megatron. He even ordered his trine back."

"While unusual, it can still be something between them. Starscream plotting to overthrow my brother or the like."

Jazz was silent for a klik and when he answered, his voice was unusually introspective.

"Prime, I believe I've never seen Starscream cry. Not for any reason, not for any pain or loss. Whatever is going on is serious enough for that and we shouldn't ignore it."

"Prime, I believe Silverbolt mentioned Starscream acting odd in his report." – Prowl added – "If the Aerialbots noticed it too it should be investigated further. If Starscream leaves his faction, it has the possibility to change the balance of power; if he draws his trine with him even more so."

"Very well then. Jazz, you may go back to that warehouse and observe Starscream as long as needed. Will you take anyone else?"

"No, Prime, Sir – but I might ask Ratchet for a medical scanner."

"You have a hunch." – Optimus Prime knew Jazz and his devious way of thinking. Few other Autobots could think so farfetched ideas as the saboteur and he was more often good at them than failing to guess correctly.

"I do, Sir. Several in fact." – Jazz flashed a grin but did not come out with his ideas. Ohh, he'd tell if the Prime ordered him, but he knew that Optimus wouldn't; the Prime trusted him enough to make that judgment.

"Just… go then Jazz."

Jazz turned serious the klik he stepped outside Optimus Prime's office. Stopping in med-bay and telling Ratchet about the scanner he wanted to take was a wise move even for a spec ops agent – he wouldn't want the medic to be angry, as it was decidedly unhealthy for everyone involved. Transforming, he drove in the early morning light, enjoying the empty roads in the long way till the Seekers' hiding place. Just as he was getting close, his sensors pinged and Jazz stopped at a parking lot, waiting while the jets soared overhead until the way was once again clear – and continued his way transformed, using the rubble and abandoned buildings for secrecy. It was quite disgusting to wade in the half organic rubbish that was collecting by the walls of the abandoned buildings.

In the daylight the warehouse looked even more decrepit than the previous afternoon, basically just a ruin waiting to happen. Not a nice place to hide, even for desperate Seekers out to get away and stay safe from Megatron, the humans and the Autobots too. Jazz found the hole that he employed the previous cycle and cautiously peeked into the building. To his surprise, Starscream sat exactly the same place, like he hasn't moved an inch and even the almost full cube was beside him. It was about the cube and its contents that Thundercracker exhorted him for not drinking any, while Skywarp stood forlornly beside the blue Seeker and watched the exchange.

"Slaggit Star, why are you so stubborn?"

Jazz almost snorted behind the wall. What a question to ask from Starscream, of all mechs…

"Drink that right now, and after I'll set up this… thing you made us steal from Hook."

"I stole it" – Skywarp pipped up – "So you'd better use it Stars."

"Right… it isn't like I'm not sure, but…" – Starscream shrugged but his wings remained drooping, lifeless. Neither Seekers' wings were any higher, Jazz suddenly noticed. – "What did Buckethead say?"

"He ranted the usual." – Thundercracker scowled darkly – "But he didn't question us any."

"Soundwave?"

"Didn't say anything. Hard to tell with him but I think he bought it too."

"Good. You can go back then. I suppose you are on patrol now?"

"Yeah" – it was Skywarp answering, while Thundercracker scowled even deeper at the notion of going back.

"If we don't stay with you, you won't even drink energon."

"It is useless… but if it puts your processor at ease, I will." – Starscream lifted the cube to his faceplates and started to sip the bright liquid.

"It doesn't!" – Thundercracker nearly exploded – "How can I…"

"TC, stop it, please." – Starscream wasn't even shouting but still, his voice stopped the angry blue Seeker in his rant before he could start it.

Silence fell onto the warehouse. Thundercracker pulled out a contraption from his subspace and started fiddling with it, while Skywarp sat beside Starscream and started to caress a drooping wing. Jazz silently pulled out the medical scanner he brought with him and pointed its business end to the Seeker, barely a few meters from him. He scanned the upper torso and checked for the markers Ratchet told him to look out for. The Seekers gave every indication of Starscream being sparked up, from caring and protecting him till hiding from Megatron and now devices from Hook…

Still, the small scanner's gauges remained defiantly near the baselines, telling stubbornly that there was no other spark in Starscream's chamber, no glaringly obvious anomalies aside from the expected small battle-wounds and therefore no easy solution for the growing mystery. Jazz continued the scan but he was way out of his depth with the level of readings the device could take, which would need a medic to interpret. He sent the whole packet back to the Ark, flagged for Ratchet to get started on analyzing it, while he was out there and continued to listen.

"You gave up completely, don't you?" – Thundercracker's deep voice drew his attention back to the inside of the building. He was crouching in front of Starscream, holding the device that had a data cable going from it to the Seeker's servo. He offered the connecting end to Starscream, who straightened up a bit and slid his cockpit aside, exposing the spark port. Jazz almost hissed seeing the casual movement – the innermost port that led to the spark chamber was serious business.

"What is there to hope, TC? This?" – he pointed to the device while plugging its connector into his port – "This is to humor you. I know what it will tell."

"Forgive us that we still hope then." – the blue Seeker's voice was frustrated and angry but tinged with a hopelessness, belying his words. Skywarp's vocalizer hitched a sob and his servo tightened a bit over the white metal.

"I'd love to be wrong TC… you must know that."

At that klik an insistent ping tore Jazz's attention from the Seekers, demanding immediate comm connection. Jazz withdrew a few meters cautiously and called Ratchet back.

"_What is it Ratchet?"_

"_That packet you sent. It must be faulty." _– Ratchet's voice was seriously upset even through the comm line –_ "In the menu, there is a preprogrammed scan setting called Omega12. Run that on Starscream… I guess you've scanned him before?"_

"_Yeah, Ratch. Should I ask what that is?"_

"_Trouble. Run it now."_

Jazz found the medic's agitated stance strange but he found the setting and turned the scanner to Starscream again, sending the results straight back this time.

"_Primus_!" – came the answer from Ratchet after some breems – _"No surprise he is acting strange."_

"_Tell me. Is he carrying after all?"_

"_If only…" _– Ratchet's voice took up a sad tinge –_ "He is nearly dead"_

"_What?"_

"_His spark is nearly guttered out. I'm surprised he is still able to be up and around."_

"_Why? You mean an injury?"_

"_No… in fact I'm not sure. But I don't think so. I'm going there."_

"_Ratchet, no!"_

But it was too late, the medic has already cut the line. Jazz swore inwardly and called Prowl. Ratchet was perfectly capable, not to mention likely to just up and leave the Ark alone if he saw a helpless, damaged mech, no matter if it was a Decepticon or not, disregarding his own safety and the Autobot interests in the act. While it was shocking news that the Decepticon Air Commander was dying, Jazz couldn't help but think of it in terms of military influence. Starscream's demise would throw his trine-mates into mourning and all the Seekers into disarray with the loss of their leader - and it would unbalance Megatron's rule over his faction as well. Among other things.

Not that he wanted to see Starscream dying, or he took any joy in it, Jazz thought scowling. Far from it – he did enjoy the Seeker's spunk when they were both younger and less hardened by the war and if anything, he'd've wished an honourable deactivation for the mech, in a battle, gloriously, as probably he would want to go out, as it was befitting for a Seeker warrior. This… dying slowly in a decrepit human warehouse alone… this wasn't it.

The ambulance pulled up by the building with no attempts for secrecy, with squealing tires and thrown gravel flying everywhere. In the distance, Jazz could see Prowl and Prime, a little behind the twins' distinctive forms and colours. Okay, so the time for hiding was over. He stepped out of his hiding place as the blue and black Seekers jumped outside with weapons in hand, pointed at the newcomers, while Starscream covered them from behind a half crumbled wall. Jazz noticed that he still hardly moved from the place he sat down three orns ago.

"Stop!" – Skywarp screamed furiously seeing all the Autobots closing around them. They were outnumbered, but he'd be damned if he gave up without a fight. Thundercracker looked equally determined beside him. – "Go away, slaggers!"

"Skywarp! I came to help! ... if I still can" – Ratchet pleaded, trying to go forward, but the twins held him back.

"Sure. Came to help… with a fragging army." – Thundercracker snarled at them.

"I didn't ask them to come." – Ratchet finally shook the twins' servos off but stopped before Skywarp would shoot him for coming too close.

"Ratchet, I think you owe us an explanation – why did you take off all alone?" – Optimus Prime was a bit worried about the enraged Seekers but knew his medic too. Ratchet would not give up whatever he was actually doing… but he could be reasoned. But the explanation came from a different direction. Starscream stood behind the half crumbled wall, the lead from the device still connected to his chest port.

"You can all go away" – he sneered – "It isn't like we caused any harm to anyone being here."

"Like you could stand not doing any destruction!" – Sunstreaker snarled right back, cerulean optics flashing a deadly glare, causing both Seekers to hiss and turn their weapons to him.

"Sunstreaker!" – Prowl admonished the yellow twin – "Let the Prime and Starscream talk about this."

"Starscream… my medic told me most disturbing news about your… condition. Is it true?"

"You have no right to stick your sensors into my business!"

"It is true… but technically you are a Deception and I have to care you being here."

"Technically, I'm not a Decepticon any more." – Starscream snarled back to Optimus Prime's calm sentence. – "I left the Nemesis and I can't go back."

"Are you a Neutral then?"

"Guess so…" – Starscream shrugged, like he couldn't care much what the Autobot leader called him. – "You could say that."

"What about your Trine? They did go back once."

"If that is your problem we can be Neutrals too." – Thundercracker interrupted them. – "Sorry, Stars, I haven't been completely honest with you before… Megatron was furious with your disappearance. Shot Warp for a single word, he had to teleport away from it. If we went back, it'd probably be even worse."

Optimus Prime looked the three Seekers over. They still held their guns up but the stances were far less tense and there was a dejected quality in all three of them that gave credence to their words. Still, he couldn't let them stay here and probably harm humans as they tried to get energon.

"This world belongs to the Humans and you threaten them by your presence. Even if I accept your claim of neutrality, I'd have to ask you either to leave Earth or come back to the Ark with us."

"I can't fragging leave this mudball any more…." – Starscream's voice was dry and bitter. One of his servos clamped onto the decrepit wall, as if for support. His wings hung low on his back and if Optimus saw it right, the tips were either very dirty or… graying?

"Is it true then?"

"What is true?"

"Ratchet says that you are… damaged seriously."

"Call it what it is Prime. I am dying."

The silence was ringing for the next few kliks. None of them moved or even shifted, the air between the ruined buildings suddenly felt colder, ominous, dark, despite of the broad daylight. The twins looked each other, the utterance silencing their snark too. Optimus saw Thundercracker's aggressive posture slump, his wings tremble at the stark utterance from his trine-leader. It was serious then…

"One more reason to come with us. Maybe Ratchet could…"

"Oh please. I am a scientist. I know an irreversible condition when I see it."

"Stars… maybe he is right…" – Skywarp's optics were almost pleading as he looked at his trine leader – "Ratchet was the best fragging medic on Cybertron. He might…"

"I won't have him experimenting on me!" – Starscream could still screech. Albeit… the fire just wasn't in it any more. But the fury was.

"I didn't mean that!" – Optimus Prime protested.

He looked at Ratchet for help but he was shocked by the helpless expression on the medic's faceplates. He had his own scanner out and while they were arguing he took the time to thoroughly scan Starscream and the device still connected to him. He sighed and as he felt the Prime's glance on him, slowly shook his helm. It was as Starscream said, hopeless. The damage was too widespread, the spark far too weak and atrophied. It was a miracle that it could still power his frame as well as it did.

"Even your medic knows. Why can't you let me deactivate in peace?"

"In peace, Starscream? I see you hiding from the humans in a half crumbled ruin around that could go down on you any breem, in the middle of a human scrapheap, surviving on stolen, dirty energon. Is this the way you want to go _in peace_?"

"It is… it is what I have." – he whispered and it was painful to hear such an admission from the proud Decepticon Seeker. Optimus Prime made a sudden decision that he knew would be argued by and contested by many of his Autobots.

"I offer you a place with your Trine. If your condition is truly irreversible – which I'd be sorry to hear, even if you don't believe me – spend your remaining time in comfort at least."

"I don't care about comfort." – Starscream was still arguing but Ratchet saw his resolve crumbling slowly. His dying spark would cause him pretty uncomfortable last months – as it weakened, he'd be forever cold, aching with unhealing damages and in the ruined building he would be at the mercy of the winter weather; freezing, wet and miserable. They would have to steal energon from the humans, which would bring the Autobots on them again. The humans might discover them and in his weakened state, even Starscream would be in danger from the worst of them.

"Is it so offensive the place we can offer for you? Don't let your pride blind you…"

"We were Decepticons. Don't say that you wouldn't be holding us as prisoners. A place, you say? A place locked up, grounded, mistrusted, harassed? I don't think it'd be worth a little _comfort_!" – he spat the offensive word again and Optimus Prime had to admit that he had a little truth in there. – "If I can't die in peace, then at least I'd prefer it to be free."

"I swear that you wouldn't be prisoners. If I can have your word not to create problems, if you swear to remain neutral, I'll do my best to make your stay comfortable."

"I would reformat any mech who cause you problems." – Ratchet swore.

"I think we can work out an arrangement that is satisfactory for all of us." – Prowl added.

Sideswipe for his part said nothing, but inside he was sure that he'd never prank a mech dying – unless it was a real funny prank making his mood better. Even Sunstreaker was glowering with less animosity at the Seekers, only half believing the story, worried about the medic but knowing that he wouldn't lie about such a thing.

Thundercracker looked at Starscream, his opinion firmly decided already; he'd do anything for the trine-leader to be comfortable and maybe even have a chance with Ratchet's expertise, no matter what they both seemed to believe now. Staying with the Autobots was not his first choice but for Star he would do it. Skywarp was less enthusiastic about the idea but he wouldn't leave either of them. Starscream stood by the wall, leaning on it heavily as they argued through the comm. Finally, he gave up. For him it was no matter any more but for TC and Warp the Autobots might be a better choice than Megatron after he was gone – and to give them a chance to get used to the Bots they had to go now.

"Fine. We will go with you Prime. We will remain neutral and not cause any troubles. But I want assurances too."

"You shall have it, Starscream." – Optimus Prime was solemn as he promised it. He'd do everything for the Seekers as long as they remained peaceful.

"How can you get to the Ark?"

"I can still fly Autobot!" – Starscream was indignant – "I'm not an invalid."

"Sorry. I didn't mean to imply that…"

But instead of jumping in the air and transforming, it was Skywarp who teleported him up to the bright sky and held him until transforming. That little scene told them much about the proud Seeker's condition, the fact that he allowed it happen in front of grounder witnesses, Autobots even. The rest of them started their way back, Prowl comming ahead so that the guards wouldn't shot the Seekers who would arrive earlier.

-o-o-o-

"Ratchet." – Sideswipe whispered to him while they drove back. – "How come the Screamer is so bad off now? He looked just fine in the last battle, just a few orns ago."

"I must admit I was wondering the same." – Optimus's deep voice joined them – "Does this illness act so fast?"

"Actually, no. He must have felt its first signs vorns ago. But it acts in waves, worsening his spark's condition suddenly, then staying the same for a long time, even getting better before the next wave. Probably only lately it has worsened to the point of being perceivable for others."

"Actually, several of our mechs reported small signs in recent battles." – Prowl added to the medic's explanations – "Jazz's mission was exactly to find out the reason for those."

"Yeah, well. We thought he was maybe sparked up… signs were right for that too on the surface."

"So we fought with a terminally ill mech in the last… what, few vorns?" – Sunstreaker sounded seriously freaked out and Sideswipe completely agreed with him. – "Was he mad? Uhhh… forget I asked. Of course he is."

"I'm not sure how long has he known. Starscream is a scientist, I can't believe that a thing like that would avoid his notice for long. It is rare but not unknown among Seekers."

"So he knew and he still fought. Did it worsen his… illness?"

"No… it is a rare condition, I've only heard about a few cases before the war and none since; but it seems to be little affected by circumstances or actions and it runs its own course until the very end. It is probable that Megatron's… treatment of him has worsened it more than fighting in battles… but even that is just a conjecture."

"No surprise there… but still he stayed."

"Starscream is one of those who fought for their cause out of conviction. The Seekers were badly mistreated back then. A mech like him wouldn't abandon their faction for a mere illness, even if it was fatal, while he could still fight."

"Then why did he leave now?"

"Because he couldn't fight as well as he used to be and Megatron is less than accepting of any weaknesses." – Sunstreaker snorted at their inability to understand. He, the closest thing the Autobots had for a true warrior, got it perfectly – "In his situation, I'd do the same."

Noone could say much after that, the Autobot convoy drove is silence until they reached the Ark. At the entrance, the three Seekers and the two guards stood with drawn weapons and exchanged fortunately only insults not shots. Prowl sighed. He knew Cliffjumper would not take it well to let the Seekers stay peacefully and he was right. Optimus Prime, on the other servo was dressing down the surprised minibot for not obeying the order he was given. Starscream smirked smugly as they were escorted to the medbay, into an isolation unit, his trine-mates sticking close to him nervously. It was where they'd stay until Optimus could arrange their stay with the other Autobot officers, Grapple and Hoist could transform the nearby big storage area into secure quarters for the Seekers and the agreement could be finalized for their stay.


	2. Ill

**note**: I was convinced that spark-merging doesn't have to be censored, so... here it is.

* * *

**Ill**

Starscream didn't show it, much less told, but it felt marvelous to lay down again and not have to move. Although he could fly still, the transformation and the effort to move took a lot out of him, giving the ache in his spark a new reason to throb painfully again, causing several subsystems to fail and clamor for his and his remaining self-healing's attention, pitiful as that latter was. He hid the reaction from the others, like he did for vorns, but he couldn't fool Ratchet; the mech was actually a competent medic, unlike Hook. The nanoklik his scanner was out, the medic started to curse idiotic, self-destructing Seekers, causing his Trine-mates to flare their wings aggressively and attempt to step between him and Starscream.

"Ehh, stop this! He was an idiot to transform and fly and he knows it! Let me do whatever I can."

"Can you help him, Ratchet?" – Optimus Prime herded the anxious Seekers to the back part of the room that seemed small with all of them crowding into it. – "Let him have space to work."

"I will, as soon as he stops fouling up himself." – Ratchet plugged in a minor port and sent a strong medical packet through, containing painkillers and recharge inducing codes – "You will have to let me through your firewalls." – he continued in a much softer voice to Starscream.

The Seeker nodded heavily and they could see his talons curling and stabbing into the soft berth padding with pain that he was finally unable to hide. But soon the sensor-numbing programs that Ratchet sent him got through and the tense limbs slowly relaxed first at the lack of aching, then he went straight into the medical recharge. As soon as he was safely under, Ratchet started to remove armor plating and yank blackened, dead wires and circuits from several places.

"What is it Ratchet? I thought it was his spark…?" – Optimus was just as surprised as the other two Seekers. The medic's actions were clearly repairing damage but it came as a shock to them too.

"Every time he overstresses his failing spark, several systems just crash, burn out or fail otherwise. Normally self-healing could handle those, but not in this case." – Ratchet was explaining it mainly to keep the agitatedly chirping Seekers safely away from his work. It was useless to hope of them leaving, but staying away was still preferred. – "He had to do this repair for himself manually for a long time if he was hiding it. It is the only 'treatment' that is possible with this syndrome. Without this constant repair, he'd have maybe two-three months. If he lets me do it, he could last maybe a year before the next attack, which I'm fairly sure that he won't survive."

"What was that device we saw in the warehouse?"

"I'll have to check it…" – Ratchet was hesitant, glancing up to Thundercracker, but the Seeker just shook his helm negatively and shrugged a wing. He had no idea either. – "I don't know any treatment for this but he might have had some ideas. Or it was just an elaborate spark monitor."

Ratchet continued to work, slowly, meticulously repairing and exchanging the damaged parts. To the still silent Thundercracker, there were far too many of those but he was determined to stay up until the medic finished. Skywarp had long fallen into an uneasy recharge, curled into his blue trine-mate's side on the small berth. Optimus Prime left with Prowl, to manage his part of the bargain – convincing the other Autobots that they could stay. He wasn't worried about the medic being alone with the Seekers, but Red Alert would keep an optic or two on them anyway.

-o-o-o-

"You are all aware of the fact that I've granted a safe stay for Starscream and his Trine-mates on the Ark – or been notified of it now. They have defected from the Decepticon faction and expressed their wish to remain Neutral in the future. I've decided to trust their word on it."

The Autobot officers sat around the big conference table in the Ark's main command lounge. While Prowl and Jazz knew the topic of the meeting, it was a surprise for the rest of them. As it was expectable, Ironhide looked stormy and negative, Red Alert twitching and nervous, while Silverbolt and Perceptor mostly surprised. Blaster took the news with his usual cheerful aplomb and Optimus Prime could only hope that the tape deck wasn't listening to Earth music instead of the meeting… again.

"May we ask the reason, Sir?" – the small scientist asked.

"You may. Starscream is terminally ill and Megatron is not forgiving of the slightest weakness. They tried to hide from both factions on Earth, but I've offered a place for them to stay once the reason was known. They are all in med bay for now, in the isolation room."

"Sir, it… it is not safe. They c-can be harboring a s-secret plan." – Red Alert was deeply disturbed by three Decepticons staying on the Ark free. – "They have to be p-placed in the brig. The other t-two at least."

"No. I promised them that as far as they keep their word they are our guests, not prisoners."

"That was unwise, Optimus." – Ironhide's opinion came as no surprise to any mech present. – "Skywarp alone can cause plenty of trouble if left roaming freely around. This has the outlines of a perfectly planned, elaborate plot to get among us by playing our weakness. Who knows what havoc they could wreak once we trust them."

"Starscream can't fake this illness. Ratchet has already confirmed it, even before I offered them to come to the Ark. Besides we have discovered them, they didn't come to us with this."

"The other two can still use it as cover for their sabotage."

"That part can be true, Sir." – Jazz added, contemplative. The spec ops commander knew that the other two Seekers went back to the Nemesis after he started to watch them. – "They can use Screamer's condition but remain Decepticons doing their own agenda. I'm not saying it is true, but it is a possibility."

"I'm not against watching them carefully, but they are still not going to be prisoners. I promised Starscream that much and I will keep my word – as far as they keep theirs."

"They won't have any weapons and their future room is going to be under surveillance. Starscream's condition means that most of the time he will be a hostage of sorts for the other two's behaviour." – Prowl added.

"And of course we will all watch them for more reasons than suspicion." – Jazz smirked. – "My department have collected no signs of any such covert plans being made over the last few infiltration missions. Skywarp is notoriously bad in keeping any kind of secrets or taking part in spying missions. That Seeker doesn't have a spec ops protocol in him whatsoever. Neither does Thundercracker really. They are actually the worst choice for any such plot. Any of Soundwave's cassettes could do worse without an elaborate subterfuge."

"Then it is… acceptable to me." – Red Alert nodded after a few kliks of hesitation. He was paranoid, he knew well, but he could act reasonably… so far as his main concerns were addressed. As far as noone trusted the Seekers too much, he could continue observing them on the Ark and know if they did something.

"Can we… talk to them?" – Silverbolt was still uneasy with his role as the Autobot Air Commander and his required presence in the Command meetings and therefore he rarely spoke up. - "I mean, my brothers… we could all learn a lot from Seekers."

"Of course. I'm sure they wouldn't be against it – and you can keep a few optics on them in the air, where we cannot." – Optimus Prime smiled behind his facemask. The young fliers' admiration of the Seekers was well-known, just as the fact that they did have a very hard position in being the only fliers in a grounder army.

"I take it then that we all agreed?" – he looked around the table, taking in the nods. – "Very well. Every department head – notify your mechs on the expected behaviour with the Seekers. I want to see no Autobot harassing, provoking or harming them. They are free to move within the Ark, except restricted areas. They will file flight plans with Silverbolt once we work out their quarters and schedule. Naturally, if one of them breaks the rules of conduct, I want it to be reported too."

"Ohh and one more thing." – Jazz added smugly as mechs were standing up to disperse – "Make sure you mention to everyone that Ratchet promised a very painful reformat to those who dare to harass Starscream in any way."

-o-o-o-

The air in the smallish isolation room was oppressively silent. Ratchet left a breem ago, having repaired all Starscream's faulty systems and Thundercracker woke up Skywarp only to get over to him. There were still a number of lines going to him from various machines but the blue Seeker pushed those to the head of the med-berth, mindful of the connecting cables.

"Come on Warp, the medic has finished."

"Mmmm…." – was Skywarp's only answer, but he shuffled over with barely lit optics.

They carefully lay on the tricoloured Seeker's two sides, snuggled close on the too small berth and hugged his limp form between them. Skywarp fell back to recharge almost at once but Thundercracker noticed how cold the blue limbs were, how faded the wingtips looked. He rummaged under the berth for a few kliks and yanked the thermal blanket out, spreading it over Starscream's legs. The blue servos, he held between his own, stroking them lightly to warm them up. He was rewarded in a few breems when Starscream's tense expression smoothed out a bit as he warmed up slightly and fell from the medical into a normal recharge.

He remained in it for nearly a full orn, showing just how little recharge he got in that cold, ruined warehouse and Thundercracker silently praised their decision to accept the Autobots' offer. Both of them remained with him on the berth even after awakening and no other mech disturbed them either, beside Ratchet who came in to check on him a few times and left several cubes of energon for them to fill up. They talked quietly, whispering over his helm, reminiscing over better times, all the while continuing to caress the smooth white metal that warmed up slowly, sluggishly even under their sensual touches.

"TC… I can't imagine us without him. I just… can't." – Skywarp looked nothing like the vicious Decepticon warrior that he was just then. More like a frightened sparkling, unsure of how to behave in the face of such weighty matters.

"I know Warp… it is hard." – Thundercracker looked troubled, unsure and sad but held up a bit stronger than his mate.

"What is hard? It just… hurts."

"Hard is that we have to think of our lives after… after… you know."

"I don't wanna, TC."

"Do you want to go with him?"

"Yes! – he looked determined – "No!" – frightened optics snapped at the blue Seeker suddenly – " I don't know…"

Skywarp reached over the still slumbering Starscream to hold Thundercracker's servo in his own.

"I wanna stay with you TC… but I can't imagine it without Star."

Thundercracker glanced up, where the surveillance camera probably was, its presence making him even more reserved as he usually was. But he wanted Skywarp to know how he felt. The whisper was probably heard by the watchers, but it gave him the illusion of it staying between them…

"I love you Warp. I want to live with you."

"Me too, Thunder… but I will always miss him…"

"Sssh… he is coming out of it."

"I'm awake" – the familiar, raspy voice was a bit more croaking than usual. Starscream lifted his helm, turning this way and that, observing them snuggling close to him on the berth from up close.

"That posture can't be comfortable." – he said dryly, with a hint of rare humour.

"It isn't." – came Skywarp's playful voice from behind him – "But we wanted to be close. Hope you don't mind us."

"They promised a bigger berth when our quarters are ready." – Thundercracker added.

"You didn't have to lie by me."

"But you were cold."

"I can cope with it."

"But you don't have to."

"You can't always be with me to warm me…"

"But we can try, right? Stop trying to be so... self-sufficient. You are ill. Let us help you."

"Humor me… until I can't." – Starscream's voice very nearly broke with a sob. – "It isn't easy to accept. I could cope with it for vorns. I thought it would give me longer…"

"You don't need the help, fine, but we want to give it because we love you." – Thundercracker's voice contained a rare determination, to make Starscream understand.

"I love you too glitches…" – he whispered back, even more conscious for watchers.

"Ohh Star…" – Skywarp hugged him close and cried shamelessly the tears that Starscream's pride wouldn't let him show here, among the Autobots. – "I can't believe it still. Why you? Why now? It's fragging unfair!"

"Unfair is what Megatron did. This illness was… unexpected." – Starscream sighed through his vents resigned – "It progressed faster than I thought."

"I heard Ratchet while he fixed you. Said it comes in separate waves, each making it worse."

"I know. I came across it mentioned among old clan records. Apparently there was a case several generations back. But that one progressed slower as well…"

"That mech probably didn't have to fight in a war."

"And he didn't have Megatron beating him to scrap every decaorn." – Starscream's voice was surprisingly level, like he wasn't blaming the Decepticon leader any more – "but it doesn't matter any more."

"Ohh Star…"

"There is something we will have to talk. When I'm gone…" – he hushed the other two's protest and continued – "… when I'm gone, you two will be in danger. We've been Trine for eons and going I can draw you two with me."

"I can't imagine life without you, Star…" – Skywarp said, through his sobs.

"You don't have to imagine it. Live it when the time comes. You two should stay and have a full life with each other. You can even mate-bond here, the Autobots wouldn't mind. Have sparklings, make sure there are Seekers remaining. This war killed so many of us…. and for what, I wonder…"

"I can't think of it now, Star…" – Thundercracker murmured brokenly – "maybe later. Not now. Please."

"Okay… later."

Starscream drew the blue Seeker close and kissed him deeply, thoroughly to dispel the dark thoughts. He felt the yearning in their fields and the luscious caresses warmed him up enough to feel vaguely aroused. Thundercracker only stalled for a nanoklik before returning the kiss, his white lips hungrily devouring Starscream's dark ones. From behind, he felt Skywarp's mouth on his neck and nodded his helm to the side to give him better access to the sensitive cables. The pleasuring warmth was such a marvelous feeling that flooded his system, reaching out to his limbs too. Lately all he felt was cold, tiredness and the aches of the failing systems and he floated happily in the warm sensations.

A purple servo started to fondle his wingtip and he moaned into Thundercracker's questing mouth. A blue servo slid up and down on his side, dipping momentarily into seams, twanging tension cables for sensations teetering on the narrow edge of pain and pleasure, drawing even more moans from his still kissing lips. His own servos dove into blue armour seams, giving him back touch for touch. Skywarp nuzzled flush to his back, his undulating frame drawing small sparks as the plates touched and kissed, the golden cockpit scraped along his back struts in a maddeningly but still marvelous way.

-x-x-x-

A purple servo slid down with a deliberate slowness from the white wingtip all along the leading edge, firing up all the sensors on its wake, dipping into the wing hinges and lavishing marvelous touches there onto the sensitive wiring. Continuing downwards, Skywarp's talented servo stroked sensuously along the back struts, drawing perfect, tingling curves onto the plates until reaching its goal and cupped the red aft with the greedy digits. Starscream's answering groan was choked by the first, slow sparkpulse that slowly rolled into him from behind, going through and into Thundercracker.

The blue Seeker sucked on the glossa in his mouth, his lips massaging the dark ones in pleasant ways when Skywarp's first pulse rolled through them, lapping gently on his spark. He returned it with a stronger one, his servos fastening on the edge of the golden, trembling cockpit, caressing the clasps, firing the metal up, burning it until Starscream's moan turned into a keening wail between the slow, rolling pulses going through him and the quick, sharp ones punctuating them, the hot mouths on him and the devious digits digging into his seams. The two of them played with the pulses, teasing his cold spark, flaring it until its flickering light strengthened a tiny bit, until he was a writhing mess between them.

Starscream wanted to join the exchange, but his spark just couldn't any more. It barely powered his frame these orns and he was unable to send even the weakest pulse into his lovers. But they knew it and compensated for him. Skywarp and Thundercracker bounced their sparkpulses back and forth through him and it was almost as good as he could be an active participant. The warm pulses of energy, feelings and emotions rolled through his spark, warming it up, energizing it, reminding him of their love. The digits slid and sparked on his plating, firing up sensors and tensing, clenching or relaxing cables. The frames on the berth were like fused together, trembling mass of multicoloured plates, they were so close, so tightly holding on to each other.

The energy exchange sped up as their arousal grew, the pulses grew in intensity and strength. They flooded his senses like the purple fire-waves breaking on the ashen shores of Cyntax Seven, the lava planet with the fire oceans and the burning sky. They swallowed him like the finest airy, sweet high grade ever made in Vos. They lifted him up into the sky, into the freezing cold of space and the burning heart of a supernova. His voice rose in pitch until he was wailing to the high heavens in mindless pleasure. And the waves were still coming, still sweeping, throbbing through him, still raising his charge to impossible levels.

He couldn't let it go any more than he could send a pulse. Frantically clawing sensitive seams he begged to TC for more, for a release, for oblivion. Bowing backwards into Warp he keened as the pulses still swelled and bounced back, came through and burned him up yet again. Starscream shook with the charge that was not even his and finally TC had mercy on him – or he could not raise it any more and broke himself. His deeper voice twinned with Starscream's scream as release shook him – and took his trine-leader with it. The combined wave of spark energy slammed into Skywarp and he too shouted incoherently as he everything exploded and he joined them in pure bliss.

-x-x-x-

They sagged back onto the berth, the blue and black Seekers half hanging off the edge, clinging on to Starscream as much as hugging him tight in the afterglow. He was out of it mostly, the overload knocking his waning reserves out, even as his fading spark flickered just a tiny bit stronger; but the two of them weren't very much online either. Mindless servos caressed wings and the wheezing of overworked vents gave the background noise for it. Limp lips played with tired glossas and sparks spun fast, elated by the merge. They very nearly fell back into recharge when…

"Well, wasn't that a fine spectacle?"

Ratchet came through the door with his usual gentle, shy manner of a volcano about to erupt.

"Especially from a mech with one thruster already in his tomb."

Or has already erupted and now throwing sneaky, verbal firebombs after unsuspecting mechs.

The two Seekers scrambled off the berth with a speed more characteristic of the Autobot Blurr hyped up on caffeine to stand awkwardly beside it. Starscream was the only one who didn't seem to be bothered by either the snark or their reaction. He sat up slowly, carefully, mindful of his recent repairs, lifting his dark helm to glower at the smirking medic.

"Did you come just to snark or had something to actually tell us?"

"I came to tell you that your future quarters are ready, Optimus Prime convinced the officers to let you stay here and you, personally will get a few monitoring devices from me as present."

"Whoa, a full sentence without snarking. Getting old much… old mech?"

"Youngling glitch." – Ratchet's mock irritation was obvious to all of them – "Dying mechs get discount in snark as well."

Starscream scowled, but his irritation was no more serious than the medic's. He had already come to terms with his fate and it didn't bother him to hear it.

"What monitors did you mean? They don't trust us?"

"No, they are medical monitors just for you. I don't trust you to tell me when something hurts or damaged."

"Sensible." – Thundercracker added. Skywarp snickered once, his tears already gone.

"So, what are the full details of our stay? With the small glyphs and signing with our energon?"

"Optimus will be here in a breem. He gets the honour of telling you."

* * *

**note**: Thank you for all the reviews, even the anonymous ones - but I can only answer to signed in reviews. I can assure every reader though that I do intend to continues this fic (just like all my other ones).


	3. Concerned

**Concerned**

"Starscream, if you dare to take any of my monitors out, I'll reformat you to a…"

"Toaster, I know. You already told that. Anything new?"

"Nahh, just go on. I'll see you in a decaorn here - tops."

Optimus Prime waited patiently until Ratchet was finished with the Seekers, both the expectably unwilling but strangely compliant Starscream and with the lesson to his trine-mates about how to keep him in the best of health. Neither conversation was particularly comfortable for the ones involved…

-o-o-o-

"_Starscream, a word. Your bonds are very strong as you are a really old trine. When you deactivate – and no, I won't mollycoddle you about it, because it will happen and you know it as well – your trine-mates will be in danger."_

"_I know that. But it can't be helped. I will try to shield my spark from them if I'm able to."_

"_It probably won't be enough. You are not only the leader but the dominant of the trine as well."_

"_I still can't do more about it. We know the risks."_

"_There is one thing that can help them."_

"_What is it?"_

"_If they bond… mate-bond with a third. That would anchor their sparks sufficiently."_

_Starscream's lips tightened into a straight line. Ratchet knew that it pained him to even think of it and he didn't want to make him even more bitter, but he was truly concerned about the other two Seekers._

"_If they want to… find someone… I won't stand in their way." – he whispered, avoiding Ratchet's optics._

"_I'm afraid that won't be enough… they follow you in everything."_

"_As a good trine should."_

"_Meaning that they'd never seek a third while you are functioning and without your encouragement."_

_The glance that Starscream cast on him was sharp, bitter but resigned too._

"_I'll think of it."_

Starscream left the isolation room after that half-promise, half resigned sentence, telling Thundercracker to get in there, because Ratchet wanted to have a word with him. He sat on a spare berth in the med bay proper, letting First Aid attach the various monitors to his plating that Ratchet insisted on and which he intended to get rid of as soon as he was left alone. Probably not soon, because the medic was likely lecturing his trine on the handling of him, including not to be left alone or let him remove the fragging devices.

In the meanwhile, he turned Ratchet's advice around in his processor. He'd never been jealous of Thundercracker or Skywarp, whether they were merging without him or even with others – rare as that latter was even after millenias. But those were just casual partners, occasional flings, none as serious as a permanent bondmate would be. Replacing him… Even just contemplating them to take a bondmate filled him with sadness, making him feel unwanted… but then, he was an outsider ever since he discovered his condition and this would give the other two a chance to live. And they would have a far safer position among the Bots with a mate vouching for them. Yes, no matter how it pained him, he'd think about it.

Back in the side-room, Ratchet was lecturing the Seekers on how to care for an ill but stubborn and headstrong Starscream…

"Thundercracker… for Starscream to stay in the land of the functioning as long as possible, there are some ground rules that you as the closest mechs to him have to enforce. And I mean enforce because he'll probably want to do all the things he shouldn't."

"I know. I wanted to ask about it." – Thundercracker looked somber, not an unusual thing for him, unlike for Skywarp, whose tight and taut expression was entirely new.

"First rule: no transformation whatsoever. None. He will want to fly, which he can, carefully and slowly – but only in root form. Transforming would stress his spark greatly, even dangerously now."

"Okay."

"Next one: merges. I know that you did it and you'll do it again but please, keep it to the minimum. He can't merge actively anyway, but even the way you did it is very tiring for him. Momentarily he feels better after one, I know, but it damages him."

Thundercracker and Skywarp looked at each other. This rule was going to be a harsh one but for Star they would try.

"He might even want to go out this way when the time comes. Not a bad death if you ask me."

Ratchet ignored the twin shudders and the nervously flaring wings and continued.

"Ideally, he should do nothing strenuous. Fighting he fortunately won't have to – he'd have no energy to fire his null-rays anyway, but no training either. Best thing would be if he did nothing beside maybe reading datapads, but I'm realistic and I won't ask him that."

"Maybe he could work with the scientists?"

"If it was up to me, he could. But I'm not optimistic about Red Alert – you all are technically neutrals, practically still considered Decepticons. He probably won't let Starscream work on potentially sensitive projects."

"Ohh… too bad, because he'd love it. Megatron didn't need him as a scientist beside Shockwave and he hated not being able to experiment and tinker."

"I'll see what I can do… Next item: he'll never say if he has an ache, pain or a failed system. You'll have to look out for it. He does anything strenuous – you watch out for signs of a failed part and tell **me**. Be ready that he'll hate you for it."

"That, we know. Thank you Ratchet."

"And both of you… keep pestering him. To take care, to drink enough energon, to recharge, which he will do a lot, to come for checkups… he will slowly turn resigned, passive as his condition progresses. You'll have to give him a reason too to go on…"

-o-o-o-

Ratchet emerged from the isolation room with the two Seekers and stepped over to First Aid who just have finished attaching the monitors. If Starscream's expression was anything to go by, the devices wouldn't survive long past leaving the med-bay, but he held back himself so far. He looked more stormy this time around than tired, like he did lately. In a stark contrast, his trine-mates looked sad, like mechs just after Ratchet told them uncomfortable truths.

"They are ready, Prime."

"In that case… shall I lead you to your new quarters?"

"It'll be great. Thank you." – Starscream tried to be polite for the Autobot leader, their main supporter among the mostly still inimical Autobots.

"We converted a bigger space to living quarters, near to the med-bay, since we knew that you'd want to stay together." – Optimus Prime explained while leading them through the corridors. – "It is completely self-contained, with wash racks and energon dispenser too."

"Like a very comfy prison" – Skywarp chirped from behind.

"No! I mean you are free to move around the Ark, except some restricted areas. The room is for your comfort, not to contain you…" – Optimus Prime shook his helm at the paranoia of the Seekers.

"It's okay, Prime. Warp is just an aft, as usual." – Starscream answered, ignoring Skywarp's indignant 'hey!' from the background.

"I understand… it was a valid concern." – Optimus turned towards the teleporter, his whole demeanor exuding a will to reassure the nervous Seekers. – "The officers all agreed that you are allowed to move freely, although I'd like you to notify either Silverbolt or Prowl if you go flying and stay in the vicinity of the Ark. It is for your safety just as much as for the ease of mind for my security officer."

They passed a pair of minibots that Starscream didn't know the designations for – the only one of the little bots he remembered by name was Bumblebee, the yellow one because he was spying on the Nemesis a few times. These two wore some seriously angry expressions, staring at them like they would to a… well, to a Decepticon, he supposed. Nor was he surprised in the slightest. Optimus Prime was known to be softsparked and fair to the fault, but Starscream knew that not all Autobots adhered to the same noble ideals as he. It had to be difficult to accept that one's sworn enemies became guests in their home literally overnight.

"Understood. We will not cause problems… if your mechs won't instigate."

The Autobot leader noticed the glares too and nodded to Starscream, conceding the point.

"I can't change the mindset of all my mechs overnight, but I ordered every one of them to behave themselves. If you have a problem, don't hesitate to notify me or any of my officers. Fighting is not appreciated, although I can understand it in self-defense. Your comms should work anywhere within the Ark and near to it."

"We… appreciate it, Prime."

Optimus nodded. – "Here we are."

He let the Seekers go forward, interested in their reaction. They had made some mistakes with the Aerialbots' hangar when the young mechs moved in, but he hoped that by this time they learned how to cater for flier mechs with wings and other special needs. The former storage area was completely renovated, providing a large, airy floor space and even big windows cut into the outer skin of the Ark. These were invisible from the outside to minimize the security risks but it did nothing to obstruct the view from the inside. He was satisfied to hear them all _ahh_-ing and _ooh_-ing at the really magnificent view to the colourful sunset in the desert.

He smirked as he saw Skywarp testing the big berth's surface with a visible joy – it was done to be both big enough for the three of them and soft enough for the sensitive wings. Another, separate berth stood at the other wall, this one furbished with heaters and extra supports for Starscream, as Ratchet suggested, both for his privacy and extra needs that would inevitably come. A lounge area with a soft couch, a big screen, some storage space and the energon dispenser completed the room. The luxurious washracks opened between the lounge and the berth and Starscream's satisfied grunt signaled that they did right with that too.

"Thank you, Prime. We are grateful…" – he hesitated for a nanoklik – "I didn't expect it to be so… perfect."

"I'm glad that you like it. If there is anything you need… don't hesitate to ask."

"We've never had anything even close to this before. So I daresay that it will… suffice."

Optimus Prime cast a glance on the Seekers, discovering the room and its amenities like sparklings, smiled slightly under his face mask and sighed. What he would give to be so carefree again… Skywarp's almost-but-not-quite innocent, but exuberantly joyful demeanor drew him like light would a moth. Thundercracker's nearly palpable relief that he was freed from the ruthless demands of the Decepticon army was a balm to his own pressing responsibilities. Even Starscream's resigned air was somewhat desirable, as the Seeker expected nothing more from his life and so lived every orn as an unexpected gift from Primus.

Then, he shook his helm a bit, as he left them to settle in, surprised by his own thoughts. Was he seriously envious of a mech slowly dying, cast out by his former faction but not quite welcomed in this one either; or his mates, caring for him but themselves in danger of following him when he was gone? No matter how relieved they looked momentarily, there was plenty of worry, pain and sorrow underneath. That's what made him give them this little place of comfort and safety. He couldn't watch even his worst enemy dying like that, abandoned and miserable.

Still, in his processor the Seeker wings continued to shush and flex happily, their colourful expanses a pleasant sight that he saved to keep with him.

-o-o-o-

"Got all the keeping instructions from Ratchet, TC?" – a slight smirk softened the harsh words.

"He wants the best for you Stars. Just like we do."

"I will still get rid of this…" – Starscream pointed at an ugly box on his hip – "… and this." – another one on his neck. – "He can't be serious that I'll recharge with these on me. If they are important he'll have to come up with a more comfortable version."

Thundercracker tried not to laugh loud and praise the Autobot medic for his ingenious tactics. The two boxes that Starscream promptly dismantled were the dummy ones, done outrageously on purpose so he'd be satisfied by being able to get rid of them and leave the other, really important monitors under his plating alone. Skywarp looked at them with one brow-plate caught high, the device he was trying to find out the purpose of dangling forgotten from one servo. Thundercracker winked at him behind Starscream's back, allowing himself a smile as he went to try the energon dispenser.

"Wow, look at this Warp. We can even have high-grade from this."

Two black wings perked up happily at his utterance - "Serious?"

"Yeah… seems to be limited but… here you are." – he withdrew three cubes from the machine, passing them on to his mates. – "I think we deserve it now."

Starscream sipped only a small amount from the cube, pronouncing it drinkable, but Skywarp emptied his in kliks.

"Way beyond drinkable, Star! I can't remember having anything like this on the Nemesis."

"You're right Warp, it is quite good." – the blue Seeker sipped his contentedly, unobtrusively stopping Skywarp from wheedling Starscream's mostly full cube away from him. – "Drink yours up Star. You need it while Warp would just get giggly if you gave it to him."

Skywarp pouted at him and threw himself back onto the couch.

"You both are sticks in the mud if I don't lift the mood."

"True enough." – Starscream sipped another gulp from his cube but passed the rest on to Skywarp. – "That's why we keep you around."

"And here, I thought it was his looks…?" – Thundercracker's mood was lifted by the high grade, the comfortable quarters, Starscream's repairs by the Autobot medic and in general, the relative safety they now had. He could finally relax that knot of anxious worry in his fuel tank that was curling in there for the last few orns, even make a weak attempt at humor.

Skywarp preened, his black wings flaring slightly in a proud display while he was sipping Starscream's cube and snuggling to the blue Seeker's side. His trine-leader's critical optics slid over his frame and he even smiled slightly.

"They are not bad, I suppose."

"Not ba… Staaaars!" – Skywarp pouted – "Way beyond those boring Autobot colors you two wear!"

"Hey!"

"My colours are NOT Autobot ones!"

"Hehh, Star, because their Prime is not like you at all…"

Thundercracker snickered at the mock indignant expression Starscream put on.

Their light banter was disrupted by the door pinging for requested entrance. The screen beside it showed a winged shape, one of the Aerialbots. The big one, their leader, Starscream identified him.

"Come in."

The door opened and Silverbolt hesitantly stepped inside. His wings weren't as elaborately talkative as their own, but Starscream could still deduce that they fluttered between an attempted superiority and a much more submissive stance. Of course. He was a gestalt leader and by default, the Autobots' highest ranking flier – but they were true Seekers and older than him at that. Starscream couldn't help but flare his aching wings to a position befitting his rank and station and he saw with satisfaction as the younger one's wings dropped slightly in an unconscious answer. Then he inclined the appendages with a fraction of degree to show his unwillingness to challenge and he hoped the slightly graying tips told enough to the other flier as for the reason. The whole exchange would have been completely missed by grounders but it cleared the relationship between them.

"I hope that I don't disturb anything." – Silverbolt said after a few kliks of polite silence.

"No. We didn't do anything particular."

"Are your quarters adequate? They asked us to help designing it."

"It is cool" – Skywarp answered. – "Do you know what this is?"

He lifted the device that he was examining earlier – a box with colourful buttons on it. Silverbolt looked at him surprised.

"It is… uhh… a game controller. Humans have many interesting electronic games and Wheeljack was kind enough to make proper sized controllers for us."

"Your scientist made toys?" – it wasn't just Skywarp who stared at Silverbolt incredulously. All three of them did. – "You have resources and time for... for something totally superfluous?"

"Yes…?" – the big flier looked surprised by their reaction. – "He, uhh, he makes much more than weapons, you know?"

"Interesting…" – Starscream too looked faintly wishful… he envied the Autobot scientist for having the time, resources and his leader's approval to pursue experiments other than weapons research. – "It must be nice to be able to do that."

"It is… I mean, yeah, we are at war, but we try to live our lives as well." – Silverbolt shrugged a wing – "We like games, Wheeljack invents more than just weapons, Sunny paints, Blaster loves music and I'm sure everyone else have their hobbies too. You mean you didn't…?"

The three Seekers looked at each other and it was Thundercracker answering to the younger flier.

"We never had any energon to spare on anything but the war effort. Besides Megatron is all business and frowns anything…" – he paused, visibly fishing for a word that wouldn't insult their hosts – "… anything insouciant."

"It doesn't mean we had no hobbies at all." – Starscream added, pondering – "it is just… we confined those to our quarters, behind closed doors. I'd've never dreamed of experimenting with toys in my lab."

"It must have been very gloomy there… I can't really imagine that. I mean my brothers are pretty young and sometime they are lectured on decorum, but mostly we can do whatever we want to."

"Lecturing is what Star did to me after a prank." – Skywarp added, smirking slightly, but shuddering straight after – "Others would do a lot worse…"

"Ohh, when it is Prowl who is doing the lecturing, it is pretty bad! Even the twins come out from his office like they've been flogged." – Silverbolt took in the surprised and slightly frightened reactions and continued hurriedly – "Not literally! Prowl don't physically punish even the wrongdoers!"

"For us it would be literally flogging. Beating. Or worse." – Skywarp rarely ever got really serious punishments, as Starscream jealously protected his fliers, but even he had an occasional taste of it. When Megatron was in a fit, even his most loyal soldiers weren't safe from his ire.

"Not here." – Silverbolt assured them. – "Not as punishment."

They sat silently for a while, Silverbolt fidgeting a little, trying to introduce the subject he came to ask. The Seekers apparently didn't want to make it easier for him. Starscream looked half asleep, Skywarp continued to fiddle with the game controller and Thundercracker paid more attention to them than to Silverbolt. He definitely felt unwelcome. Finally, he decided to just ask it straight away.

"I was wondering… if you wouldn't mind flying with us sometimes. We fought a lot and I know… I know that we can learn from you guys."

"We have to have you around anyway when we go out." – Thundercracker pointed out. – "I do not for a klik make the mistake to believe that you – most of you Autobots anyway – trust us yet."

"True… but me and my brothers… would really like to fly with you. Not for security or whatnot."

"We'll see… they can go and fly with you as far as I'm concerned." – Starscream told him – "I'm… I probably won't do a lot of flying any more."

"Thank you. I… I think I'll go now." – and he tried not to make it look like he was running away. It didn't go as well as he'd expected, he thought that the Seekers would be more enthusiastic to fly. But apparently Starscream's illness took the edge off of their willingness too.

Starscream looked after the big frame and shook his helm. He tried to consider Silverbolt as Ratchet suggested, a prospective bondmate for his trine-mates. Probably the most sympathetic towards them, a flier and an officer and so theoretically a good choice for TC and Warp; but far too young, insecure and he would be unable to dominate the older, more experienced Seekers. He didn't even see any particular leadership qualities in the young mech either; he probably became the gestalt leader by virtue of simply being the biggest one. Or if he was the best of his brothers, then the others wouldn't suffice either.

-o-o-o-

"I think I'll try those washracks out." – Starscream announced after they were alone again. He felt filthy after camping out in that dirty human place for orns and he hoped that the hot shower might put some warmth into his aching frame too.

"Go on Star. We'll stay in here for now." – Thundercracker looked at the protesting Skywarp sternly – "You too, Warp. For the first few times we'll only leave this room together."

Starscream nodded, reinforcing the order for Skywarp and disappeared into the washracks. They were of course gleaming new, spacious even for wide wingspans and equipped with many kinds of luxuries he'd last seen on Cybertron from adjustable nozzles till automatic detailing brushes for wings. He let the hot solvent patter on his wings and armour from the many showerheads, their pleasant warmth soaking into his aching, cold limbs. There were even preprogrammed massaging brushes set into the wall and Starscream almost moaned as he leaned closer to the wall, to give them access to his plating.

Soon he had to grab one of the supports to prevent his knees give out as the pleasant sensations wore down his awareness. He picked up one handheld brush and slowly started to get rid of the grime that settled in his seams. He wasn't in any kind of a hurry so he kinda lost the sense of time spent there, but since it was the best feeling he felt for awhile, he didn't mind it. He wouldn't be averse of feeling the liquid, silky warmth caressing his frame for joors, it was that good. Almost like interfacing, the warm, loving pulses from his trinemates' living sparks - only felt in the outside, he mused.

But after awhile he could find no dirt on his frame to excuse the indulgence any more and Starscream shut down the solvent woefully. The warm air from the drier wasn't nearly as pleasant and the careful polish afterwards tired him out again, but as he stood in front of the mirror he saw his old shine once again. He stared at his reflection that was so magnificently hiding the rot inside and the old bitterness rose in his processor. He wasn't ready to go to the Well… or the Pit, whichever would have him… he didn't feel old. Only his spark. Scowling, he turned and tearing his glance from the mirror visage, stuffed the bitterness back to where it rose from. He wanted to enjoy the little warmth and lack of pains while it lasted.

As he went back into the main room, he stopped in the doorway, a slight smile drawing his lipplates. He should have thought they'd start it… the other two Seekers were laying entwined on the berth, their movements and kisses clearly telling what they were doing. Starscream didn't want to disturb them and right now didn't want to join them either. Silently, he sneaked over to the couch and sinking into the soft mesh cover watched them with that little smile still on his lips. It wasn't long before one of them lifted his helm and noticed him.

"Star, I'm sorry…"

"Shh… it is no problem. Go back to Warp."

"But you…"

"I'll just… watch."

"Are you…"

'I'm sure. Don't stop."

He truly didn't mind watching them. He felt warm and relaxed from the shower, comfortable in the soft couch and affectionate watching his mates writhe in the throes of lust. Only a slightest tinge of sadness curled in his meta to be unable to join them, but he repressed it, wanting to feel all right with it. He'd be watching them many times from now on, Starscream knew – it wasn't just Ratchet who knew the dangers of this illness. But it was all right, he'd watched them before while he could still send out a sparkpulse. He enjoyed it, they didn't mind it, and if he ended up with self-service, it was all the better.

The low moan drew his attention back to the berth, Skywarp writhing under Thundercracker's mouth that roamed on his neck cables and he sent a slow, rolling pulse into his spark. The purple hands were both fondling the blue wings and Skywarp shunted back the pulse harder, faster, causing Thundercracker's vents hiccupping as he bowed backwards slightly under the pleasurable assault. Starscream on the couch, slid lower and sent one servo down on his own hip seam, talons delving into his most sensitive circuitry. He continued to stroke himself in the same rhythm as the blue Seeker's servo caressed the black hips, hypnotized by the sensuous motion.

Thundercracker throbbed back a fast, double pulse to retaliate Skywarp's and Starscream moaned quietly at the ecstatic expression on the teleporter's faceplates as the charge slammed into his spark. His blue servo slid under the edge of his cockpit, pressing down on the sensitive sparkport in tandem with the purple ones that tightened on the blue wingtips. His wings flexed back, into the soft back of the couch, tingling with the friction as he moved them up and down, rubbing the sensitive metal onto the mesh. On the berth Skywarp was babbling nearly incoherent as wave after wave of charge pulsed into him, barely able to return them and more clinging onto Thundercracker than fondling him.

But the blue Seeker didn't mind the tighter grip on his wings as he panted with the swelling, rolling pulses that bounced back and forth between them. He returned to Skywarp's mouth, kissing him deeply, devouring him with his lips as he did with his sparkpulses. Starscream sped up his rubbing of the hip seam, rolling a particularly sensitive wire between two talons, his clouding processor almost, almost convincing his spark to send out a pulse. Fortunately he stomped down on the urge in time and made do with strong caresses to the sensitive vents. It was different, it wasn't the real thing, but it felt pleasurable enough and he'd be content with it. Half the arousal was what he saw on the berth anyway and what little trickled into the trine-bond.

Skywarp shouted out as a strong pulse swelled into him and sending it back, he bit down gently on Thundercracker's lower lip. Their cockpits scraped together as he bowed upwards, sending the energy back, hungry for its return, for completion finally. But the blue Seeker had another trick in his repertoire… lifting up, away from the black chestplates he kept the pulse back, making Skywarp beg incoherently, babbling _please, please TC, let me, please_… as he grabbed for the quivering blue wings. Starscream felt his own charge jump up with the scene, it was so unbelievably erotic.

Thundercracker didn't tease Skywarp for long as he couldn't hold himself back for long and when he dropped back flush to the black Seeker, he pushed all the held back pulse, pouring it into Skywarp in relentless, blissful waves. Starscream clawed at his own spark chamber at the edge of being painful, his wings flexed back into the couch and he shouted with Skywarp as release claimed them. Skywarp's spark swelled out with the overload, throwing Thundercracker into his own release and all of them sagged back onto their respective surfaces.

Starscream remained online even though he managed to overload as well and with almost shuttered, hazy optics he watched the other two becoming almost one so tightly they held each other, whimpering in their afterglow. There was no place for sorrow in his pleasantly sated processor at the sight of them. Pushing himself up more comfortably on the couch, he curled up for some recharge of his own.


	4. Adjusting

****Note: "normal speech, _"comm line"_

* * *

**Adjusting**

"Remind me what are we supposed to do in the Autobots' rec room?"

"Have fun?" – Skywarp's bubbly mood was simply irrepressible. The youngest Seeker was nearly dancing as they moved through the Ark's corridors towards their goal.

"It will be ever so funny as they beat us to scrap…" – Thundercracker didn't trust the Autobots to keep their word. Not for long anyway. But they agreed to brave the common room, because it started to get very boring in their quarters, even with the big screen, the games and the movies. Starscream was happy to read the datapads, even after throwing one into the wall where it shattered into pieces – he was growling something about accursed Autobot propaganda, but didn't elaborate more on it and the pad was completely ruined. Still, even he was ready to see a change of scenery after two orns. No matter how much he loved the chance to relax and take it easy, it was enough even with his illness-induced tiredness.

"I hardly think they'd do that. More likely we can expect some provocations and insults – which we will ignore. Right?"

"If you can do that, we won't shame you either." – Thundercracker prodded his trine-leader's shoulder with some slight tiff – "It wasn't us who could never stop talking back to Megatron."

"I seriously doubt if either of the Bots is in that class." – was Starscream's only answer and the blue Seeker had to admit that his not-so-slightly conceited leader had a point there.

The rec room was lightly populated in the early dark cycle period, most mechs present having no shift later and therefore relaxing there with friends longer than the earlier rushes to refuel and back to work type of throngs. It also meant larger groups gathering and busy with their favourite entertainment, from games through conversations and of course some watching a movie. The Seekers chose a table by the wall and near the exit, not even bothering to hide their nervousness. This was seriously foreign ground for them, so much so that a battlefield wouldn't be a wrong simile in their minds.

They were all too aware of the numerous and mostly inimical optics staring at them. No mech made a move to get over to their table, but the murmurs rose up and they knew it was them the Bots were talking about. Thundercracker got up to bring them energon and as they sat back, he and Skywarp was careful to tuck Starscream between them, into the best defendable place. All their wings were flexing and occasionally trembling nervously, and not even Skywarp remembered that he'd wanted to have fun. They were warriors and so fleeing was not an option either without a loss of face.

"I don't know which kind I hate more. Turncoats or backstabbers." – the slightly raised voice carried perfectly to their audials from a nearby table.

"I know it just fine. Both are despicable cowards." – this one was a red minibot, one of those who glowered at them on the corridor.

The table was surrounded by similarly sized mechs with variously hateful expressions. They didn't seem to have any game or common project among them, only a few cubes of energon, high grade by the look of its hue. But they all seemed to be focused on the Seekers now.

"So, Warp. Exactly how does one have fun here?" – Starscream asked only slightly ironically, trying to outtalk the insulting voices. But the black Seeker didn't have time to answer even if he had an idea about it. Which he didn't.

"By kicking traitors, I'd say." – came the retort from the other table only to have a sharp, precise voice snap at him from the door.

"Cliffjumper! You've been specifically ordered not to provoke the Seekers."

"Provoke, Sir? I just expressed my opinion about backstabbing traitors in general to my friends."

Prowl only looked annoyed at the insolent answer, doorwings high and stiff on his back.

"Insulting my intelligence ranks next to disobeying orders in the list of strongly unadvised things you can do. You are to stop your provocations or you'll be banned from the rec room."

The small red bot grumblingly acquiesced and the voices once again fell to a background murmuring level. Starscream looked appraising his Autobot counterpart, while Skywarp didn't even bother to hid his grin. Prowl drew a cube of energon for himself and deliberately went to the Seekers' table.

"May I join you?"

"Sure."

"I heard your question, Starscream. The rec room offers many types of entertainment. Many are the same as in your quarters, only sometimes more enjoyable in company. Sometimes, we have various parties in here, some with competitions, or dancing, or even religious gatherings. The proposed schedule is listed on a screen by the dispenser, but, since we are at war, it is only a tentative one, with events frequently changing dates, organizers or form."

"And the attendance…?"

"Generally every mech not on duty may attend. Aside from that, restricting access to some of the more popular events is a great tool in keeping the more… rowdy of the crew in line."

"Like the twins. Hiya Prowler." – the cheerful voice came from a mech they all knew well and not nicely either; the Autobot saboteur, Jazz. Thundercracker flared his wings to warn him but Starscream waved it away, a bit annoyed by the overprotective streak his trinemates developed about him lately. He was ill, not invalid. Not yet anyway.

"It is Prowl, Jazz. And hardly anything keeps Sideswipe in line when he is in a quest of new pranks."

Skywarp couldn't help but snickering, which made Starscream slap lightly his helm from behind.

"No Warp. We do not want you to even think of pranks!"

Jazz snickered together with Skywarp. The spec ops mech of course knew about the black Seeker's fondness of idiotic pranks and the exasperation these pranks usually caused to his trinemates. If he got into a prank war with Sideswipe… no, it wouldn't bear contemplating. Even Jazz shuddered a bit at that thought. The red twin would have the advantage of knowing the Ark better and having his twin as an accomplice – which would be countered by teleporting and the Seeker trine acting together, including Starscream's intelligence and Thundercracker's patience. Truly, if they wanted to still have a place standing, this must not be happening.

Starscream opticked the doorwinger with a calculating look, measuring up the mech carefully while on the surface he exchanged some verbal barbs with Skywarp. Now, there was a mech perfectly capable of dominating, even despite of his smaller stature. He was an officer too, capable of protecting his mates from the Autobots, just as he demonstrated. The doorwings he sported were the next best thing after real wings; although he couldn't fly with the Seekers, they'd all understand wing language. But would he be interested…? One way to find out.

The rest of the rec-room excursion went quietly, without mechs approaching or insulting them either. Starscream considered it as a victory. Of sorts.

-o-o-o-

"I have to spend the next joor in med-bay. There is no reason you shouldn't go flying in the meanwhile."

"But… don't you want to fly too, Star?" – Skywarp was staring at Starscream surprised and didn't understand when Thundercracker slapped the back of his helm lightly.

"Warp, shut it. If Star doesn't want to fly he must have a reason for it." – Thundercracker did notice what Skywarp didn't – the tight, pained way Starscream held himself, the way his talons tightened into a fist regularly, trying to hide it but still visible to a patient observer. He only let it pass, because he had to go for his check-up anyway and he didn't look like wanting to cop out of it.

"Avoiding Ratchet is unadvised, I'm told." – Starscream tried to joke – "You two go to Prowl first so the Autobots don't freak out seeing you flying."

"Okay, Star."

"And behave for him, Warp."

"Suuure, Star, I will!"

The two Seekers barely shut the door of their quarters when Starscream commed to Prowl.

"_Prowl, my trine-mates are on their way to see you. Do you have time to talk to them?"_

"_Affirmative, Starscream. Is there a problem?"_

"_Not a problem, no… they want to go flying, that's the excuse, but… do you have a little time to tell them a few things?"_

"_Like what?"_

"_About the Autobots. The Ark. Anything. They will have to stay here when… when I'm gone and they don't know anything really. They stay in this room far too much – mainly for me."_

A klik of silence came back in the comm line, before Prowl answered._ – "I can, but… why me? I'm sure Jazz could do better…"_

"_You did all right last time. And I think they like you."_

Starscream almost heard a brow-ridge going up, impossible as that was through the comm line._ – "I'm honored… if you think so, I can of course help them."_

"_Thank you. I have to go to meet Ratchet."_

"_Prowl out."_

When the comm line was closed, Prowl sat unmoving behind his office table, thinking the situation over. Of course he knew that Starscream's trine-mates were uncomfortable to go anywhere in the Ark fearing the enmity of some of the crew. Having no duty shifts and staying with Starscream all the time in their quarters meant that they couldn't meet with Autobots to get to know them. He also knew that after Starscream was gone it would be advantageous to have the two Seekers integrated into the crew and have them helping however much they were willing to. Therefore, if it was the case of the Seekers _liking_ him specifically, then it was _him_ who should start them on that road.

When his door pinged with their request to entrance, Prowl stood to receive them, his doorwings free of the however comfortable, but still constricting chair's embrace. It wasn't often necessary to employ them in a conversation, most of the Autobots being grounders and not having the slightest inclination as to their underlying content, but to talk with two Seekers without their assistance would be impolite. They were uncomfortable enough as it was, without their trine-leader to take point and provide them focus.

"Uhh… we were told to notify you before going outside, flying."

Thundercracker was surprised by the SIC who they were told was totally emotionless and driven purely by logic, welcoming them by standing and coming forward from behind his desk and with a very nice, friendly cant of his doorwings. Skywarp smiled his usual, vacant smile that he wore when in a presence of an officer he didn't want to get angry at him.

"Of course, Thundercracker, I'm gratified that you follow proper procedure."

"I, uhh… thanks…." – was there anything else he was supposed to say?

"Do you feel all right on the Ark so far? It must be difficult to adjust."

"It is…" – _slag, he couldn't say all right, not with the constant glowers whenever they left their room_ – "… nothing we didn't expect, Sir."

The doorwings flared outwards to show concern.

"Is there something - or some mech in particular - that I can help you with?"

"Not really… I mean it is just looks. We can handle them."

"It would help if you interacted more with mechs. I'm sure that not every mech is considering you an enemy still."

"Only those we met so far…" – Skywarp quipped, half annoyed, half joking.

"I can't believe that. You've met all the officers and…"

"… and even those are divided on the issue." – Thundercracker interrupted Prowl – "the other Bots are even more so and not even letting us to get closer to them."

"If it would help, I can be of some assistance in that. There is a small party coming up next orn and if you wish, I can accompany you there."

"We'd appreciate that." – Thundercracker shifted slightly from one thruster to the other. He wasn't one given to fidgeting, but he really wanted to go flying. The Autobot was being helpful, and they shouldn't antagonize him, but that was the only reason he hasn't left yet.

"Sure, a party sounds great." – Skywarp really looked forward to it, as his perking wings showed – "Shall we go now?"

"Of course. I didn't mean to keep you from flying." – Prowl's doorwings conveyed a small apology for it which their wings answered with an acceptance.

The Seekers left the office to find an Aerialbot to fly with and looked at each other.

"He is a polite one, this Prowl."

"Yeah…" – Skywarp fidgeted a bit – "haven't you got the impression that he was… I don't know… trying to… chat up?"

"Flirt? No, I don't think he can flirt at all."

"But close to. I guess…" – Skywarp hummed – "It might have been as close to flirting as he'd ever get."

"Disturbing."

"Yeah. I know."

Their conviction that Prowl had a motive just strengthened when the mech was there when they came back from their flying, welcoming them and accompanying them to the med-bay to collect Starscream. On the corridor Skywarp moved closer to Thundercracker, in an unconscious effort to find safety in the company of his trine-mate. Not that Prowl was in any way threatening, but they weren't sure what he wanted… or why.

-o-o-o-

Meanwhile in the med-bay…

"Stop fidgeting."

"I don't!"

"You do. Stop it. If you continue to shift, I'll cross these wires and you'll definitely have reason to be uncomfortable."

"Your bedside manner sucks."

"But it works."

"Works to keep mechs away from you medbay."

"Less helm-ache for me."

"More later to actually catch and fix them."

"But then I can threaten them more."

"Are you sure you have medic coding? I swear Hook was more compassionate than you."

Ratchet mock snarled at Starscream at the implied insult, but in fact he was secretly glad to engage the Seeker in a verbal sparring – it was far preferable to the dejected, resigned air he sported before. He knocked lightly with a wrench on the dark helm though, not hard, more like implying the action than real hurting, to show his displeasure at the comparison.

"See?" – Starscream's _Itoldyouso_ expression was smug, despite the slight wince that the tap on his helm caused.

"That hurt?" –Ratchet's optics turned serious.

"You gave me a processor-ache."

"You gave me one first. Open that part, I will have to scan it."

"It is just an ache."

"Nothing is 'just an ache' for you now."

Ratchet ignored the murmured _'all medics are sadists'_ jibe that was low enough to pretend not to hear, and opened the back of Starscream's helm with a specialist tool.

"Uhh-ohh."

"What is that?" – the Seeker's voice was slightly more alarmed than so far.

"Don't flap those wings around." – Ratchet snapped, batting one away from his servo – "One of the connectors to your main processor was blown sometime in the last few joors."

"I don't want to point to the mech knocking on my helm just a breem ago." – Starscream crossed his arms on his cockpit with a slight frown and tried to keep his wings away from the medic.

"It wasn't the cause." – although Ratchet was sure of it, he still looked a bit contrite. – "You must have been thinking too hard to blow it. What devious plan are you hatching?"

"I plan nothing!" - the Seeker snarled, his wings flaring in a distinctly frightened reaction. – "I wouldn't jeopardize our place here!"

Starscream's agitation was far out of proportion to the weak joke, Ratchet thought, until he remembered where the Seeker came from. Of course an accusation like that would remind him to Megatron… the medic cursed his big vocalizer inwardly. He awkwardly patted one of the white wings while working on the Seeker's open helm.

"I didn't mean it, Starscream. It was just a thoughtless joke."

"D-don't joke with this. One of the reasons I left was that I just couldn't take his paranoia any more. Not just physically…"

"Okay, as I said, I'm sorry." – Ratchet paused, measuring the new connector in his servo and biting off a curse – "Hold on, I have to find another replacement. Hook seems to work with different sizes than we do."

"You don't want to leave me here with an open helm!?"

"Just a few kliks… and I'll be back." – Ratchet threw back on his way out.

Wheeljack's store of spare parts was not far from the med-bay and it wouldn't hurt the Seeker to sit on the berth for an extra breem.

"Slagger…" – the Seeker's answer floated after him until the med-bay doors closed on the medic's heel.

Starscream pouted and crossed his arms on his cockpit. He wasn't used to being ignored and left there with a by-the-way order to stay there and sit on his aft. Not even Megatron dared to order him to stay somewhere without a blow or at least a pinch to one wingtip to make him listen. But he didn't dare to move around, not with the fragging medic leaving his helm wide open. Fiddling absentmindedly the device Ratchet left beside him on the table to keep his processor from being blown by boredom, the Seeker sat there, thinking of his trinemates enjoying their flight outside, envying them for the flight-freedom, until…

"Fragging, treacherous Seeker!"

The enraged shout came just ahead of a small but heavy red blob that slammed into his side, pushing the surprised Seeker to the side until he toppled over the med-berth, flailed for a nanoklik to grab onto something, before the unexpected weight caused him to crash down to the ground, the weight – a small mech? – on top of him. Starscream shrieked first in surprise, then in pain as the slagger, whoever it was landed on his right wing, bending it painfully.

His talons clawed into plating, not caring about being careful in their grip as he bent his arms backwards, trying to remove the flailing mech from his back and wings. The bot continued to curse him with nonsensical, ridiculous insults and rained hits onto his back plates, denting the metal there and occasionally on the white wings that the Seeker tried to flex forwards, away from him. Starscream screeched as the already bent wing was hit further, throbbing with real pain now.

"Slagging idiot, get off me!"

"Murderous Con! I'll show you! I'm not fooled by your act!"

"What act, you tiny rustheap?"

"You planned to deactivate Ratchet, I know!"

Starscream gaped wordlessly at the last sentence, surprise momentarily causing him to lose his grip on the mech's plating. Who was this idiot?

"What the frag? He was working on me, you slagger! What is your malfunction?"

"And you planned to return it with your cowardly assassination attempt?"

"I didn't do or plan anything with him, you glitched piece of scrap metal!"

Starscream finally managed to grab a limb and pulled on it to dislodge the small menace from his wings. Unfortunately, as he threw off the minibot – he must have been one judging from the size, albeit he had a voice and an attitude enough for a much bigger mech – one of the flailing limbs hit the back of his helm, where the open part was. Starscream felt a shot of sudden, burning agony there and a scream started to form in his vocalizer, dying halfway through as darkness consumed him and he fell limp.


	5. Angry

**Note**: put back the spark scenes and changed the rating to M. I hope it will be OK.

_Also Merry Christmas and Happy New Year for all my readers. :-)_

* * *

**Angry**

"Come on Warp, it wasn't that bad…"

"Am not talking to you."

"Actually… you are."

"Am not!"

Skywarp snapped at Thundercracker, something he almost never did – but then it wasn't often that his blue trinemate took somemech else's side against him. Their flying started out well, with two of the Aerialbrats following them and the four of them bickering over the comm and flying every which way, until it all deteriorated into a silly game of chase and grab that had no rules other than those they made up on the spot. Skywarp and Fireflight expectably found the game funny, Air Raid pronounced it silly but still took part enthusiastically, while Thundercracker thought it childish, but worth indulging Warp's _excited youngling _side.

The red and black flier proved to be surprisingly good in the air and Thundercracker remembered that he has always been the one giving them the most trouble in their former battles too. With some training he could be easily up to par with themselves, despite of his youth. The brat had a serious knack for aerial maneuvers and scarily good speed and agility. Fireflight wasn't too bad either, but his extremely short attention span and sporadic bouts of eagerness towards completely random objects made him almost dangerous to fly near him.

Skywarp wasn't used to any flier around him being as random in his movements as himself. The Aerialbot was scatter-processored to a degree that even the black Seeker found it to be scary – no surprise that the two of them quickly drove the more sensible ones to the defensive. With TC and Air Raid keeping their distance from the more exuberant fliers it was only a matter of time for Fireflight and Skywarp to collide and crash into the wooded mountainside. The Aerialbot was quite used to such collisions and laughed while picking pieces of trees out of his joints to be able to transform again, but Skywarp was deeply embarrassed at being seen to crash.

"Come on Warp, it's nothing really. Hardly a few dents."

"What happened?" – Prowl asked, watching them coming in. In Skywarp's case, more like limping in.

The black Seeker had quite a few dents, besides being spattered with tree leaves that stuck to his armor, creating a distinctly interesting design on him. Thundercracker glanced sharply at the SIC, waving him behind Skywarp's back not to pry the matter further. Prowl lifted a brow ridge, but complied when he saw the black Seeker's stormy expression. Skywarp in a bad mood is not to be trifled with, Thundercracker's signals suggested and Prowl believed the blue Seeker who had to weather his trine-mates' moods for eons. They walked on the corridor in silence after that, Skywarp slightly ahead, while the other two letting him his space, Thundercracker trying to engage the Autobot with a different subject.

"If that leader of theirs doesn't mind, we could teach a few tricks to your fliers."

"It would be very helpful." – Prowl answered. To get to know the Aerialbots would be a start to integrate the Seekers among the Autobots. – "And I'm sure that Silverbolt would welcome the help."

"Is Fireflight always this…"

"Flighty?"

"Scatty?" – it was Skywarp, throwing the word back to them.

"More or less, yes. They are all very young and Fireflight does have an attention problem."

"It's a miracle he survived so far." – Skywarp snorted, not letting go his displeased air.

"They are all very protective of each oth… hey!"

Prowl couldn't finish the sentence, because the two Seekers suddenly lifted their helms much like human dogs when picking up a scent and their optics went all hazy, like focusing inwards, to their trine link. Then, all of a sudden Skywarp was gone in a flash of purple, while Thundercracker set off running, a short curse bitten off mid-word and clipping Prowl with his wing in the process. He was speeding away in the corridor full tilt and Prowl knew that something must have happened with Starscream for them to leave him like that. Anxious, he too set off in a brisk pace after them.

-o-o-o-

Ratchet was looking for the proper size connector in Wheeljack's stores when he heard the shouting and commotion from nearby. At first he dismissed it as possibly some of the idiots, like the twins or the minis having a shouting match in the corridor, but lifting his helm as the sounds became clearer, he realized two things. One, the sounds came from his med-bay, in itself unusual, as not even the twins dared to brawl in his domain; and the more worrying is that one of the voices was the distinctly high and raspy tone of Starscream. The nanoklik that latter fact became clear Ratchet was up and running towards the bay door, knowing that the Seeker in his present condition was quite vulnerable.

He arrived back there just ahead of Thundercracker, the automatic doors almost too slow for them to open. In the med-bay, the voices changed from Starscream's higher pitch into Skywarp's deeper but no less furious shouts, the black Seeker just pulled a red mech off his Trine-mate, the tricoloured frame was rather worryingly limp and quiet on the floor. Ratchet fell onto his knees beside Starscream, only caring a tiny bit that Skywarp was dragging Cliffjumper farther and beating him to scrap, interspersed with enraged shrieks of _slagger_ and _murderer_. The minibot acquired dents, scratches and gashes in a great rate thanks to the enraged Seeker, but he was still in a better condition than Starscream. Moving at least, flailing to defend himself from the much bigger Seeker, with little success.

"Come on Star, don't be like that…" – he murmured, worry almost constricting his voice at seeing the dark optics and the right wing bent and gone almost fully gray.

"Is he… dead?" – Thundercracker's voice was almost a whisper as he kneeled beside them, holding one limp, blue servo in his own. The grey that started to spread worried him greatly.

"No. I don't know what… ohh."

Ratchet saw the connector he was going to change knocked aside, probably the result of Cliffjumper's attack, one end impacting into the processor housing. Transforming his digits into his smallest grabbing tools, he carefully cut away the bent pin and removed it from its dangerous position. The processor itself didn't seem to be damaged but he had to make sure and for that he'd need Starscream online. Peripherally he saw Prowl arriving and with some difficulty pulling the snarling and clawing black Seeker off a beat-up Cliffjumper but he paid little attention to them beyond a quick scan making sure the minibot lived. Starscream was the more critical patient.

Plugging into the neck port, he tried to scan the Seeker's processor, but the offline mech could not give him access through his firewalls that were slightly higher and stronger than the former curtain wall around Vos. Cursing the _paranoid Seekers who doesn't trust their medic_, Ratchet tried another avenue. Carefully fitting the new connector into place, he checked the area over for any loose cables or further damage. Peering behind the part he already opened up, he saw a tiny piece of metal, probably from the clasp of the helm-plate in there, pinching an energon line.

"Slag."

"WHAT IS IT?" – Ratchet didn't know that Thundercracker could yell in such a high, fearful tone. He winced slightly at the volume.

"Shut up. I'm working. Take your mate and move away."

Prowl tried to drag the two Seekers away so Ratchet could have enough space to work, but they weren't willing to go far. A step and both of them halted, growling at his insistence as well as at the red minibot nearby. Fortunately Cliffjumper was out of it completely, thanks to Skywarp's timely arrival and aggressive methods to remove him from his trine-leader. Prowl wasn't sure what happened, but considering that the Seekers so far caused no trouble, it was perfectly possible that Cliffjumper overreacted something… as he often did.

Kneeling beside Starscream, still on the floor, Ratchet opened up another part of his helmet, this time not bothering with finding hidden clasps, just cutting the metal away in a hurry. Carefully reaching into the new opening, he carved away the little piece of metal from the energon line. Logging into the Seeker's medical port, using the limited access that he was given last time, he sent a medical packet into his systems to forcibly online him. If there was no other damage, he should come online from this… he waited anxiously as for a few kliks nothing happened. He was just about to move back to the helm when he heard the Seeker's engine change pitch as he struggled to online.

"Thank Primus…"

He vented out in relief as the red optics powered up and Starscream moaned low, apparently in pain still… Ratchet quickly offlined the sensors in his right wing, as the sensitive appendage was looking quite bad, although the grey was receding back slowly from it, giving way to the colours. Waving Thundercracker over to help, they carefully lifted him onto the table so he could work on him easier, now that the immediate danger of permanent offlining was past. He was sure that the struggle damaged a lot more than was visible outwardly.

"Starscream? Do you understand me? Your processor was injured. Run a self diagnostic on it but also let me scan it."

Starscream stared at him mutely for a tense, nervous few kliks with unreadable optics, before relaxing and nodding. Ratchet felt his ping to access approved and dove in to scan the Seeker's processor, perceiving the parallel process of Starscream's self-diagnostic running as well. It didn't take long.

"You were fortunate. Only a few bad sectors and nothing serious."

Ratchet didn't want to express how relieved he was. He had left the Seeker here with an open helm, the med-bay unlocked and albeit he couldn't know about Cliffjumper coming, much less attacking Starscream for whatever reason, the damage was still his fault too. Not to mention…

"Hold on. Where the Pit do you think you're going?"

"I think I spent quite enough time here." – Starscream's voice was dry but Ratchet was sure it was hiding something – probably how much the attack has shaken him.

"Not yet. You have blown a few things struggling that I have to fix. Again…"

"Starscream, could you tell me what Cliffjumper did or wanted?" – Prowl used the lull in the conversation while Ratchet worked to gather some info.

"Slag if I know. He was spouting something like that I wanted to kill Ratchet... and proceeded to beat me. And before you ask, he hit me first."

"What were you doing before he attacked?"

"Sitting here." – Starscream paused, his red gaze narrowing as he thought back – "and fiddling that scanner there."

The scanner they all fastened their gaze on was nothing special, just another tool Ratchet held near the berths to have them handy. Ratchet shrugged, Prowl tried to find a connection between the events while the Seekers glowered darkly at the still offline minibot who was by this time tended by First Aid.

"He will be asked when he is online. An investigation will be necessary."

"I have nothing to hide." – Starscream shrugged a wing. – "Nor am I going anywhere."

-o-o-o-

Laserbeak withdrew from the vent and wriggled his way out of the Ark's service tubes. His job done, he flew back to the Nemesis, to report his findings. Soundwave wasn't surprised after reviewing the recording; he expected the Seekers to turn up with the Autobots sooner or later, as they could hardly hide effectively for long on Earth from everyone.

"Lord Megatron: Seekers found."

"Where are they?" – Megatron snarled the question at his calm SIC.

"Location: Ark. Status: neutrals."

"So the traitor defected! I knew that treacherous coward was going to do that one orn, but the other two…"

"Trine: expected to follow leader."

"So much for their so-called loyalty." – the tyrant sneered, considering the fitting punishment for them already.

"Seekers: loyalty to Trine: first. Choice: nonexistent."

"Any information as to why Starscream defected now?"

"Starscream: frequently in med-bay, tired. Visual records only. Trine: protective. Possible cause: carrying."

"What?! That traitor defected… TO HAVE A SPARKLING?"

"Possibility: high."

Megatron grunted once and sat back on his throne. Much as he hated it, shouting at his unemotional SIC has not been nearly as satisfying as it was when Starscream stood in Soundwave's place, cowering and expecting a beating. The telepath just… didn't react and it diffused his rage every time, leaving him less angry but more frustrated. So a well-deserved punishment for the traitors was perfectly in time to satisfy his need for violence.

"I won't let him get away with this treachery." – he growled.

"Starscream: stays in Ark."

"He has to come out for flying. Slagging Seekers can't stand being grounded for long."

"Time of flight: impossible to forecast."

"Do not presume to tell me impossible, Soundwave." – Megatron rarely threatened the telepath, but he wasn't in the least satisfied with being told that it was impossible to punish the errant Seekers. – "I want to hear a plan, not excuses."

"As you wish, my Lord."

-o-o-o-

The hearing convened a few joors later didn't uncover any great surprises. The still dented and scratched Cliffjumper insisted that he saw the Seeker with a weapon and was sure that he had attacked Ratchet. He also accused the other two Seekers to attack himself with no reason whatsoever, blithely ignoring that he was beating their ill and at the moment unconscious trine-leader. He was glowering at the Seekers with a ferocity that could have been almost comical, had they not known that the minibot would attack them again, given half a chance. He was also surprised, nearly shocked when the officers didn't automatically accepted his accusations. Starscream's version of the events was what he told in the med-bay too and Ratchet of course supported it, glowering at the minibot threateningly all the time.

"No, there is no way my scanner looks a weapon to anyone with a functioning processor." – he snapped at the protesting Cliffjumper. – "It lacks a barrel, a trigger, a sight and anything that'd distinguish it as a firearm."

"Thank you, Ratchet." – Prowl, by this time had no doubt as to what happened, but fairness demanded that he asked an outside opinion. Calling Bumblebee, on shift for the monitors during that time to the hearing, he proceeded to ask him what he saw. The monitor feed in med bay, for privacy issues was a visual feed only, not including the audio portion of the regular surveillance cameras. The yellow minibot calmly described the events, not intimidated by Cliffjumper's aggressive posturing and frantic waving to him.

"I saw Ratchet working on Starscream, then leaving the med bay. Cliffjumper attacked him almost straight away as he entered. Then Skywarp teleported in and pulled Cliffjumper off his Trine leader."

"Can you describe what was Starscream doing before the attack?"

"Well, he was sitting on the berth…." – Bumblebee hesitated, trying to remember – "I don't believe he did anything else."

"Any indication as to his intention? Anything in his servos?"

"He looked bored. What would that indicate…? And he had one of Ratchet's scanners in his servos."

"Are you sure it was just a scanner? Have you recognized it?"

Bumblebee looked surprised and even a little angry. He saw of course what happened in the medbay and he was nearly shocked to deduce that it was the reason for Cliffjumper to attack. He ignored his fellow minibot's angry glower – he wasn't going to lie, no matter what Cliffjumper wanted him to say or do. The Seekers did nothing wrong and the red minibot has always been the shoot first, ask questions later type.

"Yes, I'm sure. Just a regular scanner that Ratchet generally uses."

"Thank you, Bumblebee."

Prowl glanced at the still angry Seekers and the similarly glowering minibot but he saw no need to gather any more input. Ironhide, while not happy with the events, made no objection and no demand either - he was present as the minibot's immediate superior. The weapons officer realized that Cliffjumper actually acted baseless this time and therefore deserved the punishment that Prowl was going to give him.

"Cliffjumper, you earned yourself a decaorn in the brig for attacking unprovoked and double shifts to work out your excess energy. Afterwards you will have sessions with Smokescreen to work out your issues."

"But Sir…!"

"No buts. No mech other than you saw a medical scanner for anything else but what it is. You've been ordered to cease provoking and attacking the Seekers twice and you still carried on."

"But they…"

"Cliff, shut up." – Ironhide growled at the minibot.

"Skywarp, while I understand your enthusiasm to defend your Trine leader and I do not condemn you for that, I still ask you to entrust dealing justice to us, officers."

"I thought that he killed Star…" – Skywarp grimaced. – "…we didn't come here for Starscream to be attacked… it is not what your Prime promised."

"You have a point there, Warp." – Starscream miraculously sat the hearing through with almost no words at all, as he actually enjoyed seeing fair and honest proceedings. It was interesting to see how the Autobots handled such things and he wasn't disappointed.

"I understand that… and I'm sorry for how some of the crew behaves." – Prowl's doorwings conveyed an honest apology, one that meant more to the Seekers than his words.

"I don't know how much it worth, but I'm sorry for what happened too." – Bumblebee added – "I think many of us needs a change of perspective still. It would be easier if you tried to meet with more of the crew…?"

"Yeah, Prowl said the same." – Starscream answered cautiously to the yellow minibot, who looked more friendly than any of his kind so far – "We might come to this party, he mentioned later on."

"I'll be glad to see you there."

While Ironhide took the frustrated Cliffjumper to the brig the Seekers went back to their quarters, the excitement quite enough for awhile.

-o-o-o-

A few joors later Starscream shifted nervously from one thruster to the other and stood more than a bit hesitant in front of a door, in a corridor far enough from their own room that he acutely felt the strain just from walking the distance. He almost turned back twice on the way here and still wasn't completely sure that it was a good idea. He lifted one servo uncertainly to signal his presence… and before he could have any more second thoughts, pressed the small button. When no answer came even after a few kliks, he turned to leave, shuffling away quickly.

"Starscream."

Turning back, Starscream vented hard and hitched his wings up as he looked… way up. Slag, he almost forgot how tall his former partner was.

"I… uhh… can we talk a bit… if I don't disturb you, that is…?"

Skyfire stared at him for a few more kliks but finally nodded. Neutrally, cautiously, but nodded and motioned the Seeker inside. They both felt the awkwardness of the situation and it didn't help that Skyfire decided that his time he wasn't going to be the one trying to alleviate it – he'd come forth far too many times accommodating his former partner and he wasn't going to be blamed for something any more times. Starscream for his part was nervous, insecure and hating himself for it – never a good combination for the proud Seeker. But he decided before coming here that much as he didn't like it, he owed to Skyfire. He walked in the shuttle's room to put a bit of a distance between them and turned to face him.

"Skyfire… I know we didn't part in the best mood…"

"Considering that you shot me, no, we didn't." – his voice was guarded, almost cold.

"Umm… yes. I… I'm sorry for that. I mean, I should have known that the Decepticon side was not for you." – Starscream paused, glowering at the innocent floor before continuing – "Skyfire, I came to apologise. For calling you a traitor, for that shot, … for everything, I guess."

When he heard no answer, his hopes crumbled quickly, insecurities catching up with him in full force.

"I understand if you don't want to… do anything with me after all…" – he mumbled, vents constricting in a strange way, and Starscream turned sadly and took a small, heavy step towards the door.

"Wait!" – a big, white servo barred his way and Starscream lifted his helm slowly to look at his former friend's optics which, despite of what he expected didn't shine with rejection – "I was just… surprised. By the actual apology. I didn't expect it from you…"

"There are things that… change one's beliefs." – he answered bitterly – "I'd hoped back then that we can be together again. As friends or colleagues. I thought that you betrayed me…"

"Star, I couldn't…"

"I can see that now."

"But we can be friends now… if you still want to."

Starscream realized that Skyfire was almost as nervous and hesitant as himself. It made the situation a little more bearable, to swallow his pride a little easier. He forced a little smile on his faceplates and canted his wing tentatively in a gesture of an overture.

"I'd… love that."

"Come… sit down. We have a lot to talk about."

Skyfire invited him to the table, where two stools stood, obviously designed for fliers with wings that definitely didn't take well hard backs and confining armrests. He offered a small cube of mild high-grade to Starscream that he accepted gladly; the awkwardness lessened but wasn't fully gone yet. Both sets of wings quivered with uncertainty and hesitation before Skyfire spoke up again.

"I must admit that I was surprised by you and your Trine coming here."

"I didn't exactly want to." – he answered, just holding back the anger and hurt. – "Not a lot of choices were left for us."

"Then… I don't understand…" – Skyfire looked at him bemused – "Why did you defect if you didn't want to?"

"I thought you knew? I was led to believe that your Prime announced the reason."

"No, as far as I heard… only that you are staying here, you are neutrals and not to be harassed for it… but not the reason." – Skyfire pondered a few kliks – "I'm sure the rumours tell more than that, but you know that I don't listen to those."

"Right…" – he sighed and didn't care about his wings drooping again – "So you don't know."

Skyfire shook his helm and waited for Starscream to find the words to explain it. He did notice the mood that his wings indicated and was shocked at how the Seeker let him see it – the old Starscream, the prideful and conceited mech would never show weakness voluntarily, not even before his Decepticon times. There was something seriously strange with him…

"I'm dying, Skyfire. I don't have more than a few groons, probably less than a stellar cycle. We left the Nemesis when I couldn't hide the symptoms any more and Optimus Prime… well, he offered us a place."

Skyfire heard the words but they were suddenly swallowed up by a dark fog that seemed to rise in his processor, downing any thoughts he had. It took the shuttle quite a few kliks to shook off the shocked daze… he stared at Starscream, small details suddenly magnified in his optics, the greying wingtips – Starscream would never show up publicly with those dirty – the tired, darkened burgundy of his optics that had only some small flickers of their former obstinate conceitedness showing and those drooping wings… his uncharacteristic behaviour, the apology that nearly shocked the shuttle hearing from him, the regular visits to the medbay and the unheeded but still heard little details that gossiping mechs whispered in the rec room.

"No…" – he could only whisper – "How?"

"It is a spark syndrome that pops up sometimes. Nearly nothing is known about it, it is so rare."

"B-but there is something Ratchet could do, right…?"

"Well, it is fatal. That much is sure." – the bitterness in Starscream's voice was unmistakable.

"Ohh Star…"

Skyfire lifted a servo, hesitating as he intended to caress a white wing, but not sure how Starscream would take the physical contact. But the Seeker actually lifted his wing into his servo and Skyfire didn't doubt it any more. Petting it lightly he saw in slow motion as the tense, dark faceplates crumbled into a relief.

"Did you still think that I would be angry at you?"

"I wasn't sure… I behaved pretty harsh towards you the last time."

"I could never stay angry at you for long." – Skyfire chuckled lightly – "and you did apologise this time."

"I owed it to you… and the knowledge of impending death makes one change priorities." – Starscream scowled darkly – "It is not that I have a lot of pride left."

Skyfire lifted a shocked wing himself.

"What do you mean?"

"I can hardly fly these orns. I can't even walk here without tiring. I'm weak. Worthless. Everything Megatron threw at me as an insult came true."

Starscream seemed to shrink with every word, wings drooping low, his once proud stance shrinking down into a dejected slump. He didn't look into the shuttle's optics. Skyfire stood and pulled him into a gentle embrace, his compassionate field trying to console his former friend.

"An illness doesn't change who you are Starscream." – he said firmly, brooking no argument. – "You were a brilliant scientist and it doesn't go away. You were the fastest Seeker in processor too, not only in the air."

"A fat lot of good it does… they won't even let me into a lab." – the tone was still bitter, but Skyfire saw the slight lifting of those white wings. Praise, honest approval has always been Starscream's weakness - probably because he'd got so little of it ever.

"Why?"

"They don't trust me. Us."

"Ohh… I will ask the Prime. I don't do weapons research myself, so he might let you work with me."

"I'd like that." – the ghost of a smile appeared on Starscream's faceplates.

They sat there for a joor afterwards, talking, reconnecting, both of them feeling that albeit the old flame had died but they were comfortable again as friends. Starscream was relieved by this, as he didn't want a commitment, an affair when he had so little time to look forward to. Skyfire was relieved because he fully expected an angry, resentful and therefore aggressive Starscream and got a friendly and surprisingly vulnerable one instead. That latter awakened protective instinct in him, instead of romantic ones - and he was satisfied with it.


	6. Surprised

**Note**: I'm not satisfied with this chapter, but it took long enough so I won't fiddle with it any longer - it won't get any better. I completely failed to make Starscream's matchmaking activities any kind of funny which I had hoped to achieve. Besides I'm making up his illness's particulars as I go on and some is probably illogical. Oh well...

On another note, I struggle with the other fics the same way too, so I'll probably give up and publish other updates that's been written but I wasn't satisfied with fully.

No new warnings, just the spark-merging type of interface like so far.

* * *

**Surprise**

"TC, Warp, we need to talk."

"About what, Star?"

"Do you need something?"

Starscream smiled slightly, despite of the nervousness he felt. His trine-mates were so eager to help him, to fulfill every wish he expressed and find out what he did not; in general trying to pamper him to a degree, he should have hated… but felt too good to refuse. He was curled up in his customary place on the comfortable recliner – much as he still disdained humans they had a few good ideas about furniture that felt good even on hard metal armour and sharp joints, claws and such, just had to be made durable. It felt heaven on his aching limbs in fact, far better than stark, utilitarian Cybertronian stools and berths. Smiling tightly at the other two, he continued.

"No, I'm fine for now. But there is something that Ratchet told me that needs to be addressed." – he paused for a klik, but smiled again, reassuring his suddenly worried mates. Him and Ratchet in one sentence was usually worrisome for them.

"He told me, after scanning all our sparks and the Trine bond, that it is a real danger for you two when I deactivate. He also told me how we can shield you from that effect."

"Ohh Star…"

"Don't you DARE to say that you want to follow me!" – he knew Skywarp would react so, it was clear from his expression.

"But Star…"

"No. I told you. It is not your time yet. You have to live and be happy and maybe even have sparklings. We discussed this."

"Warp, we know that you love Star. You don't have to follow him for that." – Thundercracker wasn't a lot calmer about the whole thing as his vibrating wings showed but he saw Starscream's reasoning too. – "What is it that he said, Star?"

"You have to bond with some mech. A real bond, a mate-bond. It's the only thing stronger than our trine-connection."

"NO!" – Skywarp yelled in a high, frightened voice, wings vibrating in a nervous denial.

"I'm not sure about it either, Star…" – even TC looked shocked by the idea.

"Look it is not like you have to jump into a bond with a stranger." – Starscream knew that it wouldn't be easy to convince them, mainly because it pained him more than his spark and it showed. But he hid that part and showed a determined face. – "Just think of it. There are a few Autobots not inimical to us. There are even a few who might even be good mates."

"Like who?" – Thundercracker didn't believe his own voice. He was actually considering it? If he was perfectly honest with himself, he didn't want to be deactivated just yet, no matter how sad he felt about Star's fate.

"Fliers obviously and doorwingers. That SIC of theirs showed some interest, or so you told me. The big Aerialbot as well."

Yes, Thundercracker's mind supplied the answer, Prowl did show interest towards them, as even Skywarp noticed it. He wasn't sure what he felt about the mech though. He cast a glance on his purple trine-mate and nearly smiled, he was looking so shocked, like a frightened sparkling.

"For now, just think of it, okay? Warp?"

"Okay…" – came the sullen answer – "If you don't love us any more…"

"Warp… it is not that. Don't be like that, please. It hurts me to even contemplate you with another, but I want you to survive!"

"Ohh, Star…" – Skywarp hugged him impulsively, mood shifting almost too fast for them to follow – "I'm soo sorry…"

The gentle pulse of spark-energy was nearly instinctive from Skywarp, affirming his love, apologising for the blunder and reaffirming their bond. Much as he couldn't reciprocate, Starscream could still feel it and hug his impulsive mate back, showing what he felt with a kiss instead of the pulse that he wasn't able to return. Thundercracker moved behind him, servos on his wings, gentle strokes arousing him before he rolled a pulse through him.

Starscream moaned as he was petted and stroked from both sides and those wonderful slow energy waves that felt the best lapped at his aching spark, soothing away a little of the pain he felt. Skywarp returned the pulse, deliberately slowing his usually more eager, faster style for his pleasure and kissed him deeply. Purple servos slid on his plating to grab his helm and stroke the vent slats. They both moaned into the fervent kiss, love and helplessness vying in their meta.

Their bodies twinned as much as the position on the couch allowed, Thundercracker pulling the lighter frame of Starscream to lie half on him, while Skywarp leaned over both of them. He pulsed back, arousal making the wave a bit stronger at each exchange, leaving Starscream breathless and nearly unable to reciprocate. He pulled both his mates closer, hugging them tight to his plating, desperate to feel them both before cruel fate would rob them of the love they shared.

The energy fluctuated a little with the emotions affecting their sparks, the lust coloured with sorrow. Starscream couldn't take part in the energy exchange, but he flared his field around them, pushing as much resigned acceptance and love into it as much he could. He wanted them to enjoy it while it lasted and not feel sorry for what was inevitably coming. _Lust/pleasure/love_, his field enveloped them, chasing the sad flickers away. He felt them both reacting, their pulses faster, stronger, cleaner now, resonating in perfect harmony, that they used to enjoy together.

Even just with the two of them, it was still possible. Thundercracker growled as his flares became uncontrollable, roiling through Starscream and rebounding from Skywarp's spark in delicious abandon. There were no thoughts in the pulses any more, just love and lust and joy and spiraling charge. Skywarp threw his helm backward, mouth opening to a silent keen as his spark could not contain the rising charge any more. Holding on to Starscream with a strength to cause dents, his release exploded outwards, flared through Starscream and into Thundercracker.

The blue Seeker roared, nearly loosing control of his sonics, as the throbbing energies slammed into him. He too fell over and overloaded, sending waves and waves of glorious release back to his mates, chanting mindlessly _loveyouloveyouloveyou_ in his mind and the bond as he embraced the spasming and climaxing Starscream in his arms. The tricoloured Seeker nearly fell nearly offline from the sensations. A little stray pulse zinged from the also just barely conscious Thundercracker like an afterthought, flashing through their oversensitive circuitry, eliciting a last moan from Starscream and a giggling laugh from Skywarp.

"It's the kind of _I'msorry _Warp that you should say more often." – Starscream murmured sleepily. – "But now, I don't think I have enough energy for that party we promised to attend."

"Oww, but you must come, Star!" – Skywarp recovered far faster than him of course, already ready to 'face again, make mischief or have a party – whichever came first. – "We can't really turn up there without our Trine-leader, right, TC?"

"It wouldn't be proper." – Thundercracker paused – "Not like these groundpounders would know it, but still."

"Oh, shut up, both of you. I promised to go, so I will. Just make yourself useful Warp and bring me a little energon so I can stand at least." – Starscream's almost playful tone belied the strict words and his claim of tiredness as well. They had half a joor anyway before the party started, more than enough for some rest and energon.

Prowl turned up at their door as promised exactly on time. Skywarp was actually looking forward to some real fun and was determined not to let any prejudiced minibots foul his mood up. Thundercracker was cautiously hopeful of a good time, mainly because he learned that Cliffjumper was actually forbidden to attend it as part of his punishment. They were on Starscream's sides as usual, these orns more like protecting him than for any other reason as the small party travelled on the Ark corridors, towards the rec room, already loud with music.

The party was in full swing by the time they arrived, but Prowl reserved a table to the Seekers; central enough to make it easy to interact with others, but to the wall on one side so they would feel safe. The mechs paid them less attention as well, the small groups talking over high grade, some cheering on a pair playing a video game and a few already dancing to the loud music. Starscream's wings twitched a bit; with his sensitive wing sensors he didn't like loud music nearly as well as Warp, or Thundercracker, who naturally had a higher tolerance for it.

"Hello! I'm glad that you decided to come!" – the yellow Autobot was there before they could sit down, smiling widely and surprisingly honestly, like he truly wanted to meet and talk with them – "I hope you'll enjoy the party."

Starscream swallowed his instinctive, but acerbic reply and answered to him civilly – "Thank you. We have every intention to do so."

"I'm Bumblebee, by the way," – he introduced himself for Starscream's trine-mates – "We rarely met on the battlefield, I guess."

"No, I can't say we did. More like on the Nemesis, since you're a spy, right?"

"Yes, true." – the small Bot was unshakably cheerful – "But I preferred not to meet any Cons there."

"Sensible." – Skywarp snickered at Starscream's dry humor and the minibot too smiled. Prowl looked dismayed and his doorwings quivered hesitantly at the topic.

"Say, do you Seekers like energon goodies?" – Bumblebee asked suddenly.

"What a question… every mech likes them. Not that we got any on the Nemesis…" – Thundercracker looked almost forlorn. He wasn't a high-grade type of mech, but gelled energon with flavored oil fillings… amusement rolled from Starscream's end of the bond. – "Don't tell me that you do have…"

"Why, TC, I never knew you'd have sweet denta?" – Skywarp exclaimed aloud, also surprised.

Thundercracker shrugged. – "It doesn't go well with the image of a fearless Decepticon warrior. Besides I haven't seen one for a million vorns."

"I'll bring some, okay? To tell the truth, we don't have it all that often but this party is special."

"Ohh… in what way?"

"Of course we'd like some… thanks." – Skywarp liked high-grade but energon goodies were really a special kind of treat and one that neither of them even seen for a really long time.

"You'll see it later… kind of a surprise." – with that, Bumblebee was gone.

Starscream nudged his trine-mates through the bond to engage the Autobot SIC in a conversation, to get closer to the mech, get to know him and _fraggit, don't just sit there like statues_. Neither Seeker was very enthusiastic about the suggestion and it resulted in very awkward few breems. At the end Skywarp broke it with his usual tact, nudging the Autobot slightly.

"Umm… do you wanna dance?"

_::Way to go, Warp, that was real smooth…::_

"I… don't dance often." – Twice in nine millennia wasn't often really, Prowl thought wryly, masking his shock with a practiced ease.

"Maybe you can try with Warp." – Starscream smirked – "He loves dancing and I bet he can teach you some moves."

"That is… nice…? But I'm not… umm" – even some nearby Autobots looked over to their table. The Praxian's doorwings flexed back and vibrated so hard that it was impossible not to notice.

"Uhh… it's… I mean, you don't have to…" – Skywarp was totally bemused - _::Slag, what is his malfunction? Wasn't he interested?::_

_::Dunno, Warp… he looks flustered now. Maybe he's shy.::_

_::Get him high grade then.:: _- Starscream trusted this thing working less by the breem, but he hasn't given it up yet -_ ::Usually helps shyness.::_

"I have to leave now." – Prowl stood up and tried not to look relieved about it – "I have a part to play this cycle. But all the officers are or will be present, so I don't think you'll have any problems with the crew."

"Okay…"

The three Seekers looked at each other, shrugging wings but shaking off the awkwardness of the situation as the yellow minibot returned with a platter of real energon goodies. Starscream smiled at Thundercracker, taking one and nudged the plate over to his wide-opticked mate. Thundercracker ate the gelled treat with a reverence usually reserved to religious experiences, not caring the least about their amusement at his expression.

"I think you've successfully hooked one of my trine-mates…" – Starscream's smile held just a little bitterness at the thought, but he hid it quickly.

"I'm glad you like it." – Bumblebee didn't look uncomfortable with the three Seekers around and Starscream gave him that – "Are they like the kinds you had in Vos or different? Wheeljack and Ratchet made these and they only know about ours."

"Similar enough…" – Thundercracker spoke almost friendly towards the bot, rare enough from him – "I wouldn't dream to criticize them, I enjoy them too much for that."

The minibot's laugh was open and honest as he too ate a small treat. Skywarp watched his usually reserved and laid-back trine-mate with wide optics, bemused smile plastered on his faceplates.

"Say guys, I wanted to ask something that is a matter of debate on the Ark." – Bumblebee said, just a tiny bit nervous – "Of course if you don't want to answer it, I understand."

"Ask." – Starscream didn't mind questions. They were far better than attacks or accusations.

"Are the three of you… well, mates?"

"As in bondmates?"

"Yeah…"

"No. We have a trine-bond, which is similar, just not as strong. Trine bond can be broken, albeit it is not something I wish on anyone either."

"But you act like… you know, like you are mates too."

"We…" – how to explain it to this grounder… Starscream scowled slightly - "we choose not to make the mate-bond, because of the war. If not for this… we'd've."

"So you are in effect… mates, just not bonded that way?"

"Yeah. And now it proved to be a wise decision, considering my condition."

The three Seekers' optics flashed at each other at the topic, helpless sadness from one side and resigned acceptance from the other.

Bumblebee looked sympathetic – "I heard it… and I'm sorry. There are a lot of rumours about it."

"It is no secret." – Starscream said with another scowl – "I do have a terminal spark condition so I won't be enjoying the Autobot welcome long. My trine-mates'll hopefully get it longer."

"Ohh… so that's what you meant about it being a wise decision?"

"Yes. They are still in danger, Ratchet says but with a mate bond…"

"Let's talk about something else, right?" – Thundercracker never wanted more a topic change and made sure to show it in the set of his wings too.

"Yeah… so what's this party about?" – Skywarp's false cheerfulness came just a bit suspiciously on the heels of his blue mate's asking.

"Funny you'd ask… it is a special party, and soon we'll see what it is about." – Bumblebee smiled mysteriously, turning slightly towards the rec-room door. His frame language said he was excited and expectant, which made Starscream curious – "You don't have to wait for long now."

Inside, the party was in full swing, with the noise level going up considerably and the dance floor filling up nicely with pairs or threes of every kinds of mechs. Starscream surveyed the throng carefully, noting how much more open and trusting these Bots were than any Decepticon would be in a similar situation. Of course backstabbing, and even brawling wasn't an accepted Autobot practice. Even the high grade wasn't consumed as heavily – probably because they had it more often, more freely and it wasn't restricted to rare parties.

Starscream lifted his own cube, sipping from the potent but smooth-tasting energon from it appreciating. He's been quietly nudging his mates to move about and get to know some mechs but apparently they weren't ready for that – and to leave him alone. The outward conversation stalled and the minibot squirmed in bemusement. They all looked up when two bigger frames arrived and cast a shadow on their table, resulting Bumblebee nervously scooting a bit away from them.

Sideswipe cast a wicked smile at Bumblebee, which just made the smaller bot even more nervous and shifting away from the danger he sensed. Even though the twins accepted him the most from among of the minibots, he was still on the receiving end of several pranks. Sunstreaker didn't spare a glance the squirming minibot, his unwavering stare was on Starscream's faceplates. Thundercracker and Skywarp instinctly sat up straight, put down everything from their servos and flared their wings in a cautious warning.

The silence seemed to expand and drown the rec-room noise inside their little bubble of tensions. Starscream held himself absolutely still. The frontliners were danger, had been danger to himself and his fliers for as long as he remembered. He didn't expect them to attack or do anything violent here, but Sunstreaker's expression gave nothing away and Sideswipe's smirk could hide anything. When Sunstreaker lifted a servo, all wings twitched in response.

"I wanted to say that I'm impressed." – the black servo lifted and gave an elaborate, old-style warrior greeting, carving the glyph into the air that originated far before the war, common to all Cybertronians… one he rarely ever showed to any of his fellow Autobots. – "We didn't know about your condition but you've always been a worthy adversary."

Starscream stood to receive the salute with the seriousness that it deserved. Nodding slightly, canting his wing in a purely flier reaction, he acknowledged Sunstreaker's respect with the appropriate gesture, oddly touched by the honour this enemy warrior showed towards him.

"I am honoured." – he was surprised to discover that he really felt that way – "I didn't expect Autobots to know the old ways."

"Decepticons weren't the only ones caring for warrior traditions." – came the answer in a slightly insulted tone, Sunstreaker's posture stiffening slightly – "The Autobot army is mostly comprised of civilians, but some of us remembers."

"I'd be honoured if you sat with us." – was Starscream's curt reply. They were all warriors and not even on different sides any more. It made the frontliners more acceptable than any of the Autobots so far.

The twins sat by the table and the strange, tense mood was broken. As the assorted wings relaxed, Sideswipe saluted them all with a cube and even Bumblebee looked more relaxed again.

"So… how come you left your quarters for this gathering?" – Sideswipe asked with real curiosity, gesturing around with the cube of high grade in his servo – "We've been trying to meet with you for a while now."

"Spent quite enough time within four walls…" – Starscream shrugged a wing. – "And I wanted TC and Warp to have fun, maybe even a chance to catch someone."

The shrewd, flashing glance that the frontliner twins shared made Bumblebee draw even farther from them, staying barely by the table. Starscream lifted an orbital ridge questioningly while Thundercracker barely swallowed an indignant retort to his blatant announcement.

"A specific someone or just a berth-partner?" – the question was delivered in an innocent tone but from Sideswipe that was no assurance to anything.

Starscream noted that Sunstreaker sat up straighter and cast a weighing, measuring glance at his trine mates – one that caused TC to growl faintly and Skywarp to smirk and flare his black wings. The tension just jumped up again around the table, the party noises fading into the background again, even if it was different from earlier, the fields flaring with more cautious lust than the possibility of violence.

"A specific someone… who's been giving mixed signals though." – he didn't consider the twins as suitable mates so far – TC and Sunstreaker would clash too much, while Sideswipe was frighteningly similar to Skywarp. But they didn't have time to discuss it any further as the music stopped and a lone stage light illuminated a small podium with two mechs standing on it. Apparently the main topic of the party was about to be revealed.

The twins also turned towards the spectacle but Sideswipe made sure that his chair slid a bit closer to the black Seeker's. He heard the mech's reputation as prankster and had a few ideas that he wanted to share. Skywarp cast a hesitant glance at him, but didn't move away. Thundercracker frowned but let them be… so far. He didn't know what game Starscream was playing.

On the podium, the Autobot commanding officers appeared, looking all serious and official and Starscream draw his orbital ridges together in deep thought. They didn't really look appropriate in the middle of a party.

"Attention please?" – Optimus Prime looked strangely satisfied as he waited for the noise to die down – "We've gathered together to celebrate a happy occasion, one that I didn't have to perform far too long."

He gestured to his second and third to come forward and continued. Starscream watched the Praxian's happily vibrating doorwings with a deepening frown.

"Prowl and Jazz asked me to oversee their bonding and even with the war still going on, I've seen no reason not to allow them their long-standing wish to be fulfilled. I wish them happiness…"

Starscream tuned out the rest of the speech and scowled deeply, his frustrated glance catching Thundercracker's slightly relieved one. He sighed and slumped down a little. Obviously, he was the only one considering the doorwinger as a suitable mate for his trine-mates… and the mech wasn't even free. But who else should he consider then…? As the official part of the proceedings were over and the noise grew again, he tried to dismiss his worries for the night and enjoy the party – so his mates could do it too.

-o-o-o-

Starscream hid the slight twinges in his spark for much of the last part of the event. He knew that if he showed it, Thundercracker would insist on getting him back to their quarters, or even to the med-bay, no matter how much they both enjoyed the party. The high grade helped somewhat, energizing him a bit more, but as the time went by, he felt weaker and colder by the breem. The music flowed together with the talking in his processor, creating a sea-like murmur that crested in his meta like waves, flooding conscious thoughts. The creeping cold in his limbs tingled against the efforts of the high-grade to push through clogged lines and awaken deadened relays.

Fortunately the others by the table accepted that he preferred to listen and observe and not take part in the conversation much – after a while he couldn't have managed to create intelligent answers even if he wanted to. The lights strobed strangely, changing their colours all the time, but he caught a few sentences from Bumblebee, explaining that they were something called disco lights, which apparently made it okay to pulse through the spectrum. Not that they helped him to keep coherent thoughts.

"Star, are you okay?" – he lifted his helm slowly, hearing Thundercracker's deep, concerned voice – "Or should I call Ratchet?"

"N-no need…" – he croaked as soon as he collected his will to answer – "I'm just… tired. I'd best go back to our room. You stay."

"Are you sure?" – the deep voice was relaxing on his tired processor. It lulled Starscream into the much-needed comfort, but after a few kliks he startled back to full awareness. – "Y-yes… I'll just… go."

But his legs were strangely heavy and his equilibrium queerly off, leaving him unable to stand up. He struggled as he stood, stumbled and suddenly felt strong arms catching him, holding him up and helping to stand.

"Come on Warp." He heard Thundercracker's voice wavering as he slid in and out of consciousness, trying to fight the weakness down at least while others could see it – "Take us back to our room. If he's really just tired, we can come back. The monitors are quiet so far."

Another servo grasped his and Starscream felt his processor clearing up again as the young, strong field pulsed next to his own tired, ragged one. He suppressed the momentary twinge of envy for it as unworthy thought.

"Sorry…" – he waved feebly to the mechs around the table – "Just carry on. I have to… I can't stay."

The familiar but never quite enjoyed feeling of teleportation grabbed him and deposited him in the far quieter and calmer atmosphere of their quarters. It was a relief on tired optics not having to deal with strobing colours. Strong servos held him gently and guided him towards the separate berth. He hated being led and held like an invalid… but then, he was one right now. Starscream made an effort – and it was a mighty big one – to put a pede after the other, to force his legs to hold him up and his servos to actively grab the quiet but supportive blue and black shoulders.

"It's all right, Star…" – he heard the deep voice murmuring into his audial – "don't fight it. You can recharge now, if Ratchet hasn't come yet to the monitors' alert, it is just tiredness."

He felt guided to the berth and laid down gently. The supports wore placed under his head and wings and he relaxed them finally, not even aware how hard it was to hold them up in place. Several cables relaxed too, as their load lessened and he couldn't stop a tired sigh. He onlined his optics, surprised to realize that he didn't remember offlining them. Thundercracker was worriedly leaning over him with the nervous figure of Skywarp hovering over his shoulder, biting one set of claws.

"Do you need energon?"

"N-no…" – he checked his levels, but they were actually quite high with all the high grade from the party – "I'm fine… go back to the party. I'll… recharge."

"Are you sure? I can stay and Warp go back…"

"N-no… no need to watch me recharge…" – he murmured, heaviness already overtaking his optic shutters.

Dimly he felt a thermal blanket settling over him and gentle servos patting it into place around him. He'd have no energy to turn, so the blanket was plenty safe over his supine frame. The last of the tenseness seeped out of his limbs as the warmth started to spread from the blanket into his aching legs and arms. Starscream wriggled slightly one arm to find a better position, but forgot what he wanted halfway through the movement. It wasn't important anyway, he sluggishly thought.

He more felt than saw his trine-mates move away, pede steps a quiet patter, armour plates rustling slightly, their voices a low murmur, way below what he could understand now. Their slight noises died away with the door closing and the room was draped in darkness, lit only by a few coloured LEDs on various equipments. His optics finally relaxed into the blackness, shutters closing in front of them. For a few breems Starscream felt as nearly to perfect as he got lately; warm, tired but comfortable and energized perfectly, even though he didn't need it momentarily.

But it didn't last long. One cable suddenly cramped in his thigh, jerking the whole leg with it. It lasted maybe a few nanokliks and settled again, letting him drift back to recharge. But it didn't stop. A little while and it cramped again, pulling the other cables with it in a painful notion. Then another one spasmed, bringing him fully online, enough for a whispered _frag_, before it stopped again. Starscream waited for another one for a full breem before sliding back towards recharge… but it didn't come.

Instead the actuators in his right servo tingled and the sensors there pinged him, popping up a message on his HUD, informing him that the temperature-regulator in his servo malfunctioned and it was melting. _What the frag?_ Starscream knew intellectually that there was no such thing happening, but still he had to see it. With some effort, he lifted his helm slightly, to turn to the right and look at the supposedly affected servo – which was of course lying perfectly fine under the blanket. Starscream cursed again and forcefully deleted the false alerts, setting his whole sensornet to reboot and run a level three diagnostic during his recharge cycle.

Sliding once again towards unconsciousness, with the slightly uncomfortable feeling of having no sensors online at all bothering him, Starscream sighed. He should have known that it wouldn't work. He waited until the sensornet rebooted, and set it to the lowest sensitivity, trying to regain the mood for recharge. The muted trine-bond let only snatches of his mates' emotions through, but what he could catch showed that they were enjoying themselves. Warp at least; Thundercracker's feelings never truly lost the underlying tinge of worry and care, these orns almost invariably directed at him. It warmed his spark, much as he'd never admit it.

But feelings, no matter how spark-warming they were did nothing to soothe the ache that started up in his spark, a dull, throbbing pain that wasn't strong, remained well below the sensitivity of the monitors… but he felt it none the less in the tired, dark, warm silence of the room. Nothing could make it go away, not any more. It wasn't perceivable during the light cycles, any activity or thinking could cover it up, but right now, when nothing was directing away his attention from it, it was felt. A deep, root-level ache that seemed to clamp on his spark, tighten around it like a steel band or a malicious servo, just strong enough to be felt but not to alert anyone.

His spark writhed and pulsed to throw off the suffocating presence, but there was nothing to get rid of, so it was a completely futile effort. But it weakened all the time, taking its output away from straining systems that starved even in the abundance of energon. The fuel pump worked overtime to shunt enough energon to places where it sensed the need… but not even flooding them with the sustaining liquid could they work properly without the spark infusing it with its pulse. His relays and actuators felt nearly bloated with all the surplus energon that they couldn't use. The self-sustaining and self-destroying cycle was swamping his processor with false warnings and impossible scenarios that supposedly took place in his own body.

Starscream bowed his back struts up at a particularly strong throb, seemingly reverberating in his spark chamber, his claws clenching into the berth cover. Frag. There went his peaceful recharge… once the pains came forward he couldn't ignore them and there were no sensors there that he could dial down. Riding out the waves of irregular throbs was the only thing he could do. Fleetingly he thought to comm Ratchet, but of course the medic couldn't do anything about these pains. _Owww_… another pounding ache clamped on him and Starscream was glad that noone was around to hear his pained gasps and moans. Little enough dignity he's been left with as it were… but he forgot the trine-bond.

"Star!" – fast steps closing in on the berth, a deep voice calling out to him worriedly – "I'll call Ratchet."

"N-no…" – he gasped out the answer – "Come here. Y-you can help."

Thundercracker moved closer, the berth dipping slightly as he sat beside him. – "How?"

"Your spark… please…!" – another throb took his voice for a klik – "Merge…"

"b-but Ratchet said…"

"Frag him! Need to… stabilize! Please! A pulse!"

He felt more than saw Thundercracker leaning over him, their cockpits touching slightly. It was anything but arousing now, with neither of them in the mood. A hesitant, small pulse of energy rolled out from his spark, absorbed by Starscream's but unable to return it.

"Stronger…" – it wasn't enough to stop the irregular writhing of his core, even though it felt good with the worried care and love that accompanied it.

Thundercracker hesitated for a klik before complying. It was strange not to have the pulse returned, but Starscream seemed to be sure that it would help his condition. He pulsed again, a stronger, more defined wave of spark energy and felt it enveloping Star's spark, for a nanoklik connecting them like before, synchronizing and evening out the irregular pulsing of it. The taut, pained field that was drawn tight around Starscream's frame slowly smoothed out, the tiredness that he'd felt before returning, taking the place of the pain.

"Thanks… it worked." – Starscream whispered, his limbs relaxing, voice much calmer now.

"What the frag was that?" – They were both shocked by the medic's angry voice from the door – "I said no merge!"

"I needed it. TC's sparkpulse shocked mine back into a normal rhythm."

"I never heard of a practice like that." – Ratchet's voice was gruff, but he nodded, conceding the point, when his scanner told him the same thing as Starscream.

"I read it among the clan records. There were two described cases with this syndrome and one of them had a bondmate. They did this when the affected spark started to flare irregularly. A few pulses in a one-sided merge synchronized their sparks." – Starscream stopped for a klik, still too tired for lengthy explanations, inventing heavily – "but it's not a cure. Only a symptomatic relief."

"And you didn't think of saying it before, right?" – Ratchet tried to curb his anger, seeing the tiredness on Starscream.

"Just remembered..." – the Seeker shrugged, or rather tried to – "it worked, that's the important thing."

"Well… I'll see you next orn in the med-bay anyhow. Recharge now.. if you can?"

Starscream nodded and didn't wait for him even to leave before sliding back to the darkness, this time undisturbed by the pains.

-o-o-o-

The long talks with Skyfire lifted up Starscream's spirits generally. Not only had he cleared a long-festering wound between them, gained an old-new friend, but Skyfire actually managed to secure the permission for him to work together in his lab. As he was considered half-neutral anyway, he was doing the peaceful, less war-oriented research, often working with human scientists. This latter fact had Starscream balking a bit at first, but after some expected grumbling and posturing, he more or less ignored the occasional human or two in Skyfire's lab for the privilege of being allowed there.

Much to Skyfire's chagrin, having Starscream in his lab increasingly often meant having either Thundercracker or Skywarp too, who these orns rarely left their Trine-leader alone. While the blue Seeker was no problem and no disturbance, sometimes even helping out in small jobs, the teleporting prankster could bring out rarely felt anger from the normally calm, unflappable shuttle. It took him numerous, carefully orchestrated accidents, damaging more Skywarp's pride than his plating, to make him realize that a naïve scientist in his lab was slightly more dangerous than an otherwise successful prankster in unknown territory.

There was one memorable occasion, when the bored Skywarp fiddled with a compound he shouldn't have touched – and a bit later, when he was in the middle of the rec room talking to Sideswipe, he realized that every mech was laughing at him, pointing to his new look; the white and pink femme-like Seeker he got turned into. The twins swore later that they never seen Skywarp teleport away that fast. He hid in their quarters for orns before his colour nanites shook off the shock and returned him to his old colours. Skyfire of course denied any intent, pointing out that he'd warned him not to touch the exotic, metal-affecting bacteria in the lab.

Starscream, secretly his partner in crime, was overjoyed to see how well his old partner could discipline his younger trine-mate, and they often laughed at the paint or goo-drenched, spluttering Skywarp, who was loudly exclaiming that no, he didn't push any buttons and didn't touch any beakers this time, swearing to Primus's name to prove his innocence. But as much an accomplished prankster he was, the black Seeker was at a serious disadvantage against two scientists in their own lab. It took less than a groon before Skywarp was meekly following Skyfire's orders to help in the experiments, only a few grimaces showing his distaste for such work.

But they all liked Skyfire as companion for flying, as the shuttle could carry the fast tiring Starscream back when he inevitably overestimated his remaining strength and had to land before reaching the Ark or risk falling and crashing. He couldn't go flying often, so he always tried to make it worth and extend the experience for as long as he could – much to Ratchet's chagrin later for the repairs he had to do.

"Star, shouldn't we turn back?"

"Slag it TC, we hardly left the Ark. I can fly more than a little still, okay?"

"I wouldn't call half a joor a little, not for you anyway."

Instead of an answer, Starscream dived towards the ground without a warning, leaving his trine behind. He kept to the 'no transforming' rule, but he could do a few tricks in the air even in his root mode that left the other two in his wake. He enjoyed the feeling of the freefall, the air that whipped past his frame and the gravity that pulled him inexorably down. He caught himself with a deft maneuver, just as his sensors pinged him with proximity warnings for the red, desert ground, rolled and shot upwards, towards the blue sky – and his swearing mates trying to catch up with him.

"_Starscream, go back now! We have Decepticon warning_!" – Skyfire's agitated voice intruded suddenly into the comm link.

"_Okay_." – he was disappointed but he took it seriously. Skywarp and TC got to his sides and together they flew towards the Ark, the fastest that Starscream was able, the shuttle covering their back. He passionately hated to be the one slowing them down, even more so that he'd have to retreat from a battle in the first place but realistically he was no match for anyone these orns. On the way he saw the Autobots driving out to meet the Cons someplace else, but they had other problems… namely the Coneheads who were coming at them aggressively, shooting already, even though it was basically useless from this distance.

"Warp, take Star to the Ark and get back." – Thundercracker ordered calmly.

"No!" – but he was too late and already felt the black arms encircling him and the effects of the jump. Skywarp deposited him just inside the Ark entrance and he was gone in a klik, back with Thundercracker and Skyfire. Starscream clenched his denta, feeling incredibly bitter to have to see his mates fight without him - he could only watch them. It was in a way curious to see the way they flew together; TC and Warp, long used to being trine second and third automatically fell beside Skyfire, their Seeker instincts acknowledging the bigger flier as superior. Starscream's lipplates twitched in secret amusement, remembering how long it took him, the smallest of the three to assert his dominance at the beginning - which Skyfire now achieved without even trying.

Leaning heavily to the entrance wall, Starscream appraised the aerial battle that was unfolding in front of him. It was unusual for the Coneheads to dare to come so close the Autobot ship, so it must have been a plot of Megatron to draw most of them out while the Seekers had a secret target. Probably himself, he mused. He'd always known that the tyrant wouldn't forgive their defection, even if he knew the reason for it – and considering the way Soundwave and his cassettes could infiltrate the Ark he probably knew. But if Megatron thought that the Coneheads could win over his mates, even without him, even with an inexperienced fighter with them, he was sorely mistaken.

They were learning it soon all right. Ramjet had to realize that ramming a shuttle's reinforced, interstellar grade armour was a nasty shock even for him. Dirge learning that TC was not in the least affected by his tactics and flew far better than the Conehead on his best day. Thrust had his servo full with the gleefully teleporting Skywarp who found it funny to shoot him in the afterburners repeatedly. They were driven away decisively and only Skyfire's pacifist nature and their worry for Starscream was stopping them from pursuing far from the Ark.

But even as they flew back, the Seekers kept to the formation, like it was him between them. It was funny to see… but it also made him sad. He could only fly there if they humored him by being slow and careful and it wasn't a pleasant thought, making his spark ache with the emotion, not the illness. He thought that he'd come to terms with his fate, but still… sometimes it was harder to bear. Flying was one of those times. He wanted it, needed it so he wouldn't go mad, but at the same time he hated being slow, hated tiring fast and above all he hated the unspoken sorrow that TC and Warp exuded when he did so.

They landed by his side, Skyfire checking his condition and flying off to help the Autobots in their battle. Starscream wasn't interested in the battle particulars beyond his welfare – but he lifted an orbital ridge at the look that Thundercracker cast after the shuttle. Was that interest… or just a satisfied acknowledgement for a job well done? And why had he never considered Skyfire as a possibility for them anyway?


End file.
